She Never Initiates Text but Always Responds: Here What It Means

When we have a crush on someone and we get hold of their phone number, we want to stay in contact with them round the clock. This same thing might have been happening to you. If you have managed to secure your crush’s phone number from one of her friends and you send her a text that says, “Hey, this is Alex! I got your number from Zenya. I need your help regarding a project, please let me know when will be a good time to contact you?” the text becomes time specific. 

In the above case, you haven’t mentioned anything about your liking for her. Yet again, how could you? She is your crush and this is perhaps in your eyes your most precious secret. What you must have done is, in the middle of the conversation, you could have either asked her out for coffee or complimented her by explaining your feelings. 

If you are facing a difficult time opening up to your crush or your girlfriend who hasn’t opened up to texting you first, you have landed in the right place. In this blog post, I will bring you the light explaining why she doesn’t initiate text and coding a formula for you that will enable you to make her text first. Keep reading to know more!

Reasons why she never initiates texts but always respond

A girl can respond to a text because you have taken the initiative to make a conversation. However, she may neither continue the text nor take the initiative herself because she didn’t feel a need to do it. This could either mean that she is not interested in having a conversation with you or that she is asocial.

To know more, keep reading below.

#1 She likes you 

If you get a prompt reply from a girl whenever you text her but she never texts first, have patience. Someday soon, she might break the cycle. Depending on how promptly she replies to you and how candid she is with you, you will be able to understand if she likes you. 

When a girl includes emojis in her conversation, and if such emojis include blush and heart, it is suggestive of her inclination for you. When she is sending you hearts, she is aware that if you wouldn’t have been interested, you would have taken a reverse turn. But since you are not doing so, she has it clear that you like her. To know more, click on this link - She Likes Me but Keeps Pushing Me Away

#2 She is not sure about your feelings 

If the girl is not sure how she feels about you, she will hesitate in making a move. She knows for certain that you like her, hence she is taking time to analyze her feelings. Since you already like her, she knows that if she gives a nod of affirmation, things will go uphill fast. 

She, perhaps, wants to take things slow so that it lasts long. If she is a hopeless romantic, she might hate the way the dating scene has been reduced to momentary affirmations these days. It also depends on how she met you. If it wasn’t through a dating website, the courting process might be slower. She will pose as the epitome of femininity who needs to be loved and protected by her darling lover. 

#3 She is scared of heartbreaks 

If she has had heartbreak in the past or worse, if she broke up with her ex recently, she will follow a grieving phase, which will take its due course of time. Naturally, she won’t jump on  every next guy who comes her way. You will have to prove to her that you are better than her ex and the rest of the guys who might have been trying to hit on her. 

You can do this by simply being there for her. You won’t have to sweat to prove to her that you love her. However, don't keep quiet about what you feel about her. Take the opportunity to express your feelings from time to time. She must not feel that she has been interpreting the gestures wrong nor that you are shyer than she is. 

Just don’t try too hard. You must not come out as desperate. She should feel comfortable with you. Nothing is more important that that. If she is readily having a candid conversation with you, it means she is at her best disposition with you. Learn to value this and don’t take her for granted.

#4 She has her priority sorted 

If the girl is more work-oriented, she will ignore your company. She does not want to get distracted from her main area of work. She knows that an element of romance will distract her. If she is in the prime time of her work or studies, she will not invest her time in you. 

Another factor here would be how you are doing career-wise. If you are at the beginning of your career or you are working hard to bring a start-up, the girl might be demotivated. She might be thinking of someone who can look after her, give her stability, or is a professional of sorts. 

What you need to show her is that your ideas are convincing and realistic. Show her the future. Give her insights. Tell her that she doesn't need to partner with you, just being with you should suffice. 

#5 She likes real-time exchanges 

Perhaps the girl doesn’t fancy messaging much for she knows it will eventually create a loop of texts, calls, video calls, meetups, and more texts. 

She wants to feel every moment with her crush or partner. If she is your girlfriend, she wants you to move in with her. Try to study the nerve. 

Virtual reality should not replace reality. It should be an addition to it. Hence, don't miss the personal touch. Instead, make her feel your presence around the clock. 

You can do this by knowing more about her frequent haunts, her home address, et cetera. Then you can make it your haunt. The bookstore, park, mall, and grocery stores could be a few of such places. 

Make sure that these hits are not too frequent lest she will take you to be a stalker and might begin to terrify you rather than look forward to meeting you. Getting obsessed with her isn't healthy for you either because you won't be able to function if she doesn't value you as much. 

#6 She is texting someone else 

There is a possibility, the girl used you as a medium to reach out to the guy she likes and she is busy texting him. If you have mutual friends, perhaps be alert. Your crush and your best friend might be having a great time together. 

You will get the vibes if the girl is texting two or more people at the same time. She will not reply to you promptly. Her replies might be off-handed at times, and too inclusive at other times. It also shows her emotional instability. 

She is fickle minded and while she might not know what her heart wants, she seeks attention and likes to keep people who butter her in close quarters. If you are among them, or if she treats you among them, try to challenge her opinion to see how she changes her reaction and behavior towards you. 

#7 She thinks of you as a good friend 

When the girl thinks of you to be a good friend, she has already friend-zoned you at the back of her mind. It is difficult to influence her into changing her opinion. In this case, you can try to understand what body type is the woman attracted to. We all have a natural inclination towards a body type. Perhaps taking the names of the celebrities before her or asking her directly about them will give you an idea. 

You can also drop hint asking her what is it that she likes in a guy. She would understand that since your conversations revolve around this topic, you might be trying to secure her attention. That is when she might take an interest in you and look at you nicely. 

What you need here is a change of perspective. A shift in the point of view from her angle will lead to strengthening your bond. 

Moreover, who told anything about great friends who cannot date? It is after all the best friends who tops the list of the best possible partner for life. You can get there by staying committed to her. Don’t break her trust and have her back. A word of kindness and a soft heart will get you there.

#8 She keeps busy 

If the girl is an independent woman with a lot of responsibilities or an entrepreneur, she is always busy. This could be an understandable reason why she responds to text but never initiates it. Responding to the text in this case is a natural impulse watered by her profession. You cannot rely on it to understand her feelings. 

Moreover, if you open her chatbox, you shouldn’t be surprised to see that all her exchanges are mostly formal and business-like. She might be mindful that you are from a different domain but might not care to categorize you that way. 

Read her conversations to get clarity as to where she wants to lead the conversation. If she never uses acronyms, and she too often uses initials, if she is very particular about putting the punctuations in the right place, and if she has never used or responded to an emoji or a gif, she is too professional in her attributes and at the peak of her career to care about anything else. 

That does not mean that she cannot use a deviation or distraction from the mainstream. When you come to think of it, is it possible that she is not sleeping with men? We all have our needs and we are directed forward by those needs. To keep the mind clear, to release the much-needed secretion of pleasurable hormones, and to have a surge of dopamine is essential for someone who is so work-oriented. It helps them to manage stress. 

She might have a permanent partner or she might take multiple partners for a no-strings-attached relationship. She might even not be straight or can be bi- for that matter. Hence, you need to make your path to and through her mindscape and leave a bold impression there. 

#9 She is a call-person 

While most of us in the current generation is a text people, some of us are not. The girl might fall into the latter category. She does like to text for two reasons. First, she finds it too prolonged and a waste of time. She is a woman who doesn’t like to engage in futility or anything that is non-productive, and second, she is too cunning. She does not want to leave proof in your inbox about something that she might have said or something that she intends to do. 

This is the era of screenshots that has made everything too complex and everyone too scared. If she is getting the vibes of a stalker from you, her replies will be short and crisp. She might flirt with you but it will be casual and filled with business-oriented words. It would lack the element of romance. 

Try to get her on a call with you. See what vibe you get from it. When the conversations incline towards romance, give her a compliment or two and tell her about your feelings. A sincere woman would take a woman to pause and regard your confession, and a playful woman would burst into instant giggles. The latter is a green flag that you can come to her place and please her the way she likes. The former would imply that she is going to take time to consider your proposal and would not hurry to give you an answer, because as and when she gives it, she would stay committed to them. This aspect would show that she is a woman of mindful words who likes to take life seriously and love honestly. 

#10 She doesn’t like the way you text 

If you use a lot of urban language or acronyms, the girl might find texting you an awful experience. Moreover, if she is a grammar nazi and your grammar defies all the rules of English, it will be the most horrific indulgence in letters for her. This means she is having a bad experience or a stomach ache from reading your texts.

There are two ways to sort this. First, use proper English and possibly filter your words using a grammar-oriented application, second, stop texting her and switch to calling. The latter might not work instantly because you have already created an awful impression on her. Hence, she might not answer your call. 

A wise thing to do here would be to send her a text that says, “Can we connect over a call? I can use a piece of advice from you.” Curiosity kills the cat! It will push her forward to answer your call and that is when you are not to beat about the bush but express your feelings delicately and poetically. If she laughs or blushes, she is moved by your words.

#11 She doesn’t like to become a bother 

If she initiates or opens a conversation, she will become the subject of the text. She doesn’t want to become text-centric in any case. It is a general tendency that the pressure of carrying forward the text falls on the person who texts. She is too scared that you might read her texts wrong or think that she is interested in you for other reasons. 

Such folks like to keep their life simple. They don’t want any unnecessary trouble. They like to go by word rather than going about mining the words or checking the depth. Hence, if you like them, perhaps tell them straight and they will take it for face value. Whereas, if you go about beating around the bush, you will see that she hands over the opportunity to someone else. The idiom, early bird catches the worm holds in this case.

#12 You are too good to be true 

The girl finds you so good that she doubts if it is true. She might be scared that you could be a conman who is catfishing to serve his ends. The world is so full of deluded and filthy people that if something nice happens for once, our suspicion alert beeps red. We are scared to be misguided or fooled. Hence, we don’t engage in something which is not giving us healthy and positive vibes. That surge of does of the green signal is essential for her. 

You might wonder how to show a girl that you care for them and your heart is full of good intentions for them. Most of the time, being a good listener works wonders. She will see that you listen to her and you wait patiently before giving her your feedback. This could mean the world to her. A patient person with good manners shows a gentle upbringing and the girl might be moved by it. 

#13 She is testing you 

Perhaps the girl does not initiate the text to check your patience or if you change your heart. This also shows that she is in no hurry to commit or rush into a relationship. She will take her time to study the pros and cons of dating you. If, for so long, she has only seen the good side of you, she is waiting to watch how you perform in a moment of crisis. That is what will reflect your true character or well-being. 

She wants to see if you are a man of words or action. If you make your decision based on the situation or if the situation and circumstances arise from what you do and how you perform it. It is alright to bear patience in this case because it will also reflect her character. You would know what kind of person she is and whether she believes in meritocracy or individualism, how she likes to associate with people, and where she draws lines. 

#14 She hates commitment 

Perhaps the girl doesn’t believe in relationships as much. Her parents might be a divorcee or she simply might enjoy working, living, and eating alone. Some people are loners. That’s how they thrive. 

There is no harm in asking for her opinion on what she thinks about relationships. If she has had many flings in life, she might not have trust in long-term relationships. You need to take time to build trust with her. Make her share her deepest secret naturally. 

Never push her to reveal something that she might not be comfortable sharing. Take it one step at a time and help her in creating memories. Let her fall for you for the right reasons rather than out of impulse, and she will love you brilliantly.

#15 She wants a no-string attached equation 

She wants no small talk, no private disclosure, only two people conveniently making out or giving each other company from time to time. Things are easy and sorted that way. Eventually, if she catches a feeling, she might start going out with you frequently. 

Wait for that frequency to happen. Meanwhile, see if she is interested in making out with you. Perhaps, try to hit the gym together. Flaunt your abs and attract her with your charm and gentility. Be the sexy couple and keep working on each other. To know more, click on this link - She Doesn't Want a Relationship but Acts Like My Girlfriend.

#16 She faces a hard time expressing or acknowledging her feelings 

If the girl is introverted and doesn’t like to talk about herself or open up to people that fluidly, she will have to be pushed to the zone where she will care to acknowledge her feelings. Such people are overthinkers and in their imagination, they have been on a topsy-turvy ride already with you.

What you need to do here is shake them well to dispel all the insecurities away. The easiest way to do this is by making them burst into a peal of laughter. Share such moments that they become carefree and begin to enjoy your company. That will take away all or any kind of fear from them and they, for one, will begin to accept what they feel for you.

#17 She finds you desperate 

Come to think of it. Since you got her number, have you texted her religiously? If you have always sent her a good morning and a goodnight, you haven’t given her the chance to text you first. Perhaps skip it one day and see if she drops a text that says, “I am surprised to find out there wasn’t a text from you, all day long. Are you keeping well?” 

If no such texts show in your inbox, it is because the girl might have thought of you to be a desperate man. Perhaps rather than texting her the usual “Ssup?” or morning and night greetings, make your text more close-ended and particular. 

Open the line of conversation by asking her if she is up for a chat or caught up with something. If it is the former, she is after all not bored of you and likes to get humored. If it is the latter, she is most probably done with you. 

#18 You haven’t asked her out yet 

Perhaps the girl is tired of exchanging texts and is wondering when will you take out time to finally ask her out. It gets annoying and needs a lot of patience to keep on edging to the moment of the final climax. 

Moreover, it is not always that a person over text or call is the same when you meet them in person. Many a time, you find that the person might act strangely in person and requires time to open up. They are either shy or they are so nervous that they start thinking out loud. 

The girl might have one such social symptom or she is scared that you might behave erratically. Besides, girls also have the fear that men are merely being nice to them because they want to get inside their pants and once that is done, the purpose will be served. Hence, they try to get a better hold of the man’s conscience so that the duration of courtship is something more than merely momentary.

#19 She is a snob 

Perhaps the girl is a snob who bears a misogynistic and condescending attitude toward all. She  likes to belittle others. You will notice that she likes to self-boast. Hence, she doesn’t text you first because she feels that it will make a puny out of her. 

You can understand this when you indulge her in talking about politics. Whether she has an opinion or not, what is her attitude toward the community, whether she is a racist, and basically, what is her overall take on society? An important aspect that we fail to consider while taking into account the person we want to date is their cheerful disposition. 

How happy and content she is as a woman would go a long way in contributing to your happiness. If the woman is someone who is always sad and depressed, full of agony, very pessimistic, or so practical that she is unable to make the most of her time then naturally despite her attributes, you might not feel that happy in her company. 

Always find yourself someone who has a heart of gold. She is kind, humble, and down to earth despite all the luxuries if any that are endowed on her. That is when you know that you are with the right human. Beauty will fade, nature is timeless, and it will last and keep you lasting. 

#20 She doesn’t like you 

Well, the bitter truth may be that the girl doesn’t find you likable but she doesn’t hate you either. She is replying to you out of courtesy whenever you drop a text in her inbox. As such, her replies will be with kindness and will bear that placid smile face. 

It means that she has no business with you and she is bewildered as to why won’t you stop texting her. Perhaps, try not texting her and you will realize that a week later she might fail to recognize you. 

You will come across many such people. Not every time and everywhere will the reciprocation be equal. You need not lose hope. It only means that life has kept something better for you.  

#21 She is antisocial 

Perhaps the woman is merely antisocial and she is grateful that you are crushing on her but she is so happy in her cozy zone that she doesn’t want to be bothered. Such people will find peace in all situations whether you like her or not is none of her business.

What to do when she never initiates texts but always responds? 

Your chances and actions should be dependent on how she is responding to the text. If you feel that with a little encouragement, the emerging bud will bloom fully, do so. If you fear that the thread is too fragile to be messed up with, nourish the bond with love and care. 

How to do either, read below to discover!

#1 Stop texting 

You might think that the last thing in the world that you would want to do is to stop texting her. The little ray of hope that might be visible to you can diminish completely with this step if she doesn’t feel anything for you but it will brighten up like a high-voltage lamp if she holds tender feelings for you. 

The idea here is to use negative reinforcement. You will have to try it out to be amazed by its possibilities. It will make the girl restless and as it is most women are impatient. She will confront you and spill the beans by asking you out or telling you to ask her out. 

#2 Start making calls 

Perhaps switch to calls and see if she portrays a change in her behavior. If she opens up more and there are bursts of laughter, you can gel along well with her then don’t hesitate to ask her out. 

However, if there is more silence and she is not at her best with you, then it will get embarrassing and the duration of the calls will be cut short and the message will be clear from her end, it would say to not bother her. 

Moreover, you never know, she might even have a boyfriend but they have kept their relationship encrypted. She might be keeping you as a sidekick for when her boyfriend is unavailable or she might have reduced you to a second option if she has nowhere else to go.

#3 Ask her out 

Perhaps the exchanges have been going on for a long and it is time to hit the nail on the head. Ask her out! But don’t make it boring. Send her an encrypted message or a riddle, or a hand-written invitation to join you on a date at a specific location. 

Make her feel your heart thumping for getting her close. Let your eyes talk when you see her. Dress beautifully. If you are very certain that you want to make her the woman of your life, send her a beautiful gown with a lovely message that says something such as, “I want your velvety skin to be draped in this silken fabric. No one else can look more beautiful in this than you.” 

Her heart will skip a beat when she sees you. Play a piece of romantic music. Make it the best moment of both of your lives. 

#4 Send her food 

Homecooked food is always a heart-touching gesture. If you have been talking about food recently and you asked her what it is that she enjoys eating, perhaps make her a bowl of that dish and send it over to her place with a small note and some flowers. 

It is no wonder that a guy doesn’t usually send food, more rare is when he is cooking it for you. This would make it obvious that you have strong feelings for me. In this case, she will do either of the two things. First, she will be alarmed and step back immediately. Second, she will be awed and won’t take a moment to invite you home. Either way, you will be handed over a pass of confirmation or rejection using which you would be in a better position to decide your future course of action.

#5 Borrow her favorite book 

Ask her what is her favorite book and then ask if she minds lending it to you. There is something noteworthy and special about a book that one likes to visit time and again. You will find side notes and perhaps dried rose petals too. 

You can use this as a subject to talk about. It will intrigue her because this is something that she likes. You will get to learn a ton of things about her from the type of characters she is attracted to and the kind of novel she likes to read. It will help you in understanding her personality.

Since you will have her book, she will be eager to learn about your progress and which section you enjoyed or liked the most. This is another use of reverse psychology, she will be anxious and will text you first. 

#6 Work on your texting style 

If there is a particular area where your exchange of texts comes to a halt, say a place where you use a particular lingo that might be more streetside than sophisticated in style, the girl might not appreciate it. 

Girls like to ascertain that the guy they are talking to is the very embodiment of gentility. As such, anything which proves to be otherwise is not well-regarded by them. They try to get rid of it immediately and think of it as a mess. 

Hence, it is a red flag and you should work on using polished English on paper. Refrain from using dude and babe if she is British. Call her madame, address her in Spanish or french, and she will like it brilliantly. 

Talk to her about patisserie, places, shades, entre, and topics by using fancy titles. It will help you a great deal with most women in life. They adore fancy things. You pick up a list of accessories and talk brands and see how the conversation will fast-track. You need to secure her attention by having a grip on such topics and eventually lead the conversation further in a more personal direction.

#7 Compliment her more often 

You need to compliment a girl every day if not every hour. She should never feel a need for gratification for it should come naturally to her. Make her feel beautiful, that is important. Knowing that she is beautiful is not enough. 

Figure out a way that wins her heart. For instance, if you are good with brushes, paint her a portrait. Make her see herself through your eyes. Pay special attributes or a play of color at places that involves attractive attributes. 

Make her feel wanted so that even if in the worst case she is asymptomatic to romance, she comes around and begins to shell out to enjoy your company more. Eventually, tell her about your feelings candidly. She will approve of them wholeheartedly.

#8 Ask her what she thinks of you 

If you have been exchanging texts for a long, perhaps it is time that you ask her what she feels about you. Confronting her by saying that you feel she has a special spot in her heart for you but that somehow she is not readily accepting it might create a momentary tension but ultimately, you will be able to help her out in finding better ways to deal with emotions. After all, whatever she is feeling, she is feeling it for you. It needs no denial, not in the least when it is mutual.

#9 Help her in her field of interest 

An easy way to spend more time with her is by helping her with her projects which could include her assignments, undertakings, or projects. It is great if you come from the same education and career background. You will have a lot of common things to talk about. Hold the lamp for her and she might slip her fingers between yours. 

In the real dating world, your partner must find you useful. The use should be more than the ability rounds the clock or the readiness to help them. It should be a natural affinity that you both can share and which goes a long way in making you compatible partners. 

#10 Flaunt your abs 

When nothing else works, expose your abs. Try to seduce her by sharing some photos directly or via stories, else, if you don’t have that kind of body, hit the gym with her. Work regularly and use a rich protein diet as well as a good amount of muscle training and cardio exercises to get above that neither you nor she would have imagined. 

When you feel fit, you will enjoy the makeout sessions more. You will attract the attention of more women which will make the girl jealous. She will naturally come running to you if she values all these much. If not, she is a character of depth and it will not be easy to win her smoothly.

#11 Give her time to process 

We are so excited in our fantasies that we forget to consider the other person, and how they might be feeling, or taking things up. It is therefore always advisable not to fast-track things. Allow her the time to process every moment naturally. That is the least that she deserves, right? 

Treat her like a queen and she will make you her king. The primary thing that a woman desire is respect. You keep her on the top of the list, she will be yours. 

Summing up 

Since she is responding to your text, there is a ray of hope. The chances are high that she is interested in you. What more you need to do here is see where is the slip taking place. There has to be something that is not up to her liking. Figure that out and in no time, she will also learn to take initiative. You might be dealing with a conservative woman here who gets excited by little things but never runs a risk by making a move from her end.