My Girlfriend Always Accuses Me of Cheating and Lying (SOLVED)Your girlfriend is very insecure and feels that you might leave her. This could come from body insecurity. If you check out other women before your girlfriend, she might feel this way. Try to bring about a change in your behavior by appreciating your girl more at every chance you get.
Relationships are complicated and there are moments when you find yourself in a pickle even when you have done nothing. You realize that you are fighting with your partner on petty issues. Such instances arise from misunderstandings and miscommunications.
If your girlfriend blames you for things that you haven’t done, it could mean that she feels the relationship you share with her is under threat. It could be due to insecurity. But worry not. If your girlfriend always accuses you of cheating and lying, I will help you figure out how to deal with the situation rather than giving it the better of you. Keep reading below to know more.
Reasons why your girlfriend accuses you of cheating and lying
When your girlfriend accuses you of cheating and lying, it can be a serious sign that your relationship is going downhill. This could be because you have been negligent towards her. Perhaps introspect your actions and see if it has been your girlfriend who is playing groundless blaming games or if is it you who have been so aloof and out of reach that she has been forced to think this way.
If you cannot figure it out, read this article where I will walk you through the possible complications that are formed in the later part of your relationship and how you can deal with them. Continue reading below to find out more.
#1 She finds you smiling on the phone
If you are with your girlfriend but you smile on the phone rather than share the moment with her, she will not approve of it. Think of the moment when you started dating your girlfriend. What were your reactions every time your phone blinked with her notification?
You found yourself blushing as did others. Now imagine how your girlfriend might feel about catching you like this. It gets worse when you don't share the reason with her on account of giving you space in the relationship to breathe.
If there is someone who makes you feel good again, provided your relationship has become monotonous and you don't enjoy your girlfriend's company as much as you used to do. You might think that she has become a complaining box. She might feel that you have started taking her for granted. As a result, both of you are becoming distant and walking in opposite directions every day.
This will breed toxicity and cause more fights. Hehee, if there is a person of interest in your life and you would like to give it a try, take a break from your girlfriend. Tell her that the relationship has become overwhelming and that you need time to process things.
Try not to cheat on her without giving her full closure even while on break. It is acceptable that you break up and then sleep with someone else. Until then, try to vibe with this other person and figure out the reasons why you would prefer her over your girlfriend.
Whereas, if your girlfriend is thinking it all wrong and you are interested in no other person but her, tell her the same. You must not waste a moment in clearing out your doubts. The sooner everything is resolved the better for both of you and for a healthy relationship.
#2 Your phone is always busy
If your phone has been busy lately, it could be due to your business work, your girlfriend might get anxious regarding the same. In this regard, either you can text your girlfriend beforehand to keep her informed that you are going on a long call, or you can text her while you are on the call telling her,
"Baby, I miss you so much. I'm stuck on a tedious call. Can't wait to hear your voice. Give me some time and I'll call you back."
This will sound soothing and buy her comfort. Remember, the goal is that even if you are not available on call, or not able to spend the moment with your girl, she must never feel alone. You cannot let your girlfriend feel lonely. Find a way to be present even in your absence.
#3 You don’t text her like before
If your texts have become monosyllabic, you merely use short texts and phrases for your conversation with your girlfriend, she might feel that you are sending interesting conversations elsewhere.
Messaging each other throughout the day is a vital part of the exchange. It shows that you like to be with your girlfriend. When you give a sudden break to these exchanges, it means that something is on your mind.
It is wrong on your girlfriend's part to not ask you what is possibly disturbing you in any way. She is not supposed to blame you. You must sit and talk this through with your girlfriend, explaining to her how her behavior belittles you before your eyes.
#4 You have stopped telling her you love her
If you have stopped telling your girlfriend that you love her, she might assume that you don’t love her. No matter how much you underestimate it, you need to keep sending reminders to the people you love. It makes them feel special.
What is the difference between a special relationship and an ordinary relationship? You remind the other person that you are glad they happened in your life. In such a relationship, the delight of the three words that say “I love you,” never fails. It will always make her blush the same way.
You must maintain your tone when you offer the three words to them. It should be low-pitched and full of emotion. They should not feel that you are saying it out of forcefulness or boredom. It should be delivered out of the bottom of your heart, every time without forgetfulness.
#5 She saw a new girl’s likes and comments on your photos
If your girlfriend felt that a girl is stalking you on social media, she is aware that you have been receiving the notifications too. While she cannot control other women from texting or not texting you, she does not like to see that you are not opening up about it.
In a healthy relationship, it is observed that the partners share open-heartedly if they have a crush or if someone is crushing on them. This is a gesture that is not degraded. You ought to appreciate it on account that your partner keeps their faith in you. It shows that you have a strong relationship and that you positively take things. Moreover, it is a healthy sign in the sense that you both get excited when you come across someone new.
How do you utilize or process such a piece of information? You might wonder how you process the fact that your partner is drooling at the sight of someone who is not you. By observing that person with your partner’s eyes and understanding what is it about them that can be so attractive?
While I don’t suggest you lose your individuality, I want you to enhance your sense of beauty. After all, what is fashion but how one keeps oneself according to the standard set by society? Hence, what is the harm in taking something from what you see and adapting it in your daily life? This thing could be the way one keeps their heart, fuse their attire, modulate their voice, etc.
When you learn to take things with an optimistic spirit, nothing could go wrong. What more you need to do here is to explain the process to your partner. Tell her that finding someone else attractive despite dating her makes you human but not sleeping with that other person and confessing about it before her to whom you religiously devote yourself is the task of a faithful lover.
#6 She saw you stalking someone
Perhaps your girlfriend spotted you stalking someone three times in a row. This will be enough for her to break into a row. She might think that you are fixated on someone and might use the opportunity to remind you of all the times when you forgot to like her pictures on social media.
She will burn in envy to find out that you are taking interest in someone else. Hence, the easy way out here is to either not stalk other profiles but that of your girlfriend, or tell your girlfriend the purpose of stalking the profile for she might have an eye for detail and might be able to scan through things the way a male’s eyes would not notice, thereby proving to be useful to you. The third option, which is not a wise one when you plan to date the person for a long time is by deleting your search history every time you stalk a person.
#7 You start dressing differently or grooming more frequently
When your girlfriend finds a sudden change in your grooming habits or the way you dress up, even a sudden expensive or heavy addition to your wardrobe would mean that something fishy is going on in your life without the knowledge of your girlfriend.
Asking the right question is an important exercise that most of us fail to perform. We are so focused on the other parameters and so carried away by our emotions, delusions, and wrongly interpreted observations, that our question is folded around the words that we have taken to be the answer.
Hence, if your girlfriend is not asking you what brought about or led to the addition in your wardrobe but asks you who caused the change, the question is pointing in the wrong direction. It shows that she has already made assumptions in her mind.
Either your girlfriend has always been overly anxious by temperament or you have given her reasons to be anxious. If by any chance, you have brought about this sudden and contrasting change in your appearance or your wardrobe, along with other changes such as keeping your phone busy or stalking someone on social media, or removing the photos with your girlfriend on social media, it will piss her off terribly.
#8 You became less intimate with her
If you have become less intimate with your girlfriend in bed or otherwise, that is, if you don’t find opportunities to steal kisses from her, or you don’t cuddle anymore, or you don’t take much time for foreplay and directly move on to action, your girlfriend will not appreciate it.
Taking consent, showing eagerness to please your girlfriend, and knowing how to please your girlfriend are important. By now, you must know which positions your girlfriend enjoys. Sharing that kind of comfort zone and intimacy where you cannot get enough of each other and you long for more long sessions is important.
When you are not feeling that desire for your girlfriend but at the back of your mind you feel that everything is okay and your love for her is unchanged, you require counseling. In a successful relationship, knowing that you are there or just being there for your partner is not enough. You need to do more than just be present. That’s the space of a friend. You cannot blame her later if she decides to friendzone you.
#9 You don’t pamper her anymore
If you have stopped taking your girlfriend out shopping or buying her presents or spending money on her when you go for an outing, she might not like it. Most women love to be pampered but they don’t give everyone the liberty to pamper them. They like to reserve the spot for someone worthy.
While this is true for boys too, for girls it has an emotional value. She might not look for extravagant offerings but meaningful things. She likes to see that you know her preferences by heart. When you pick up her favorite coffee from her favorite cafe when you come to see her, it will be a heart-winning gesture.
When you know that your girlfriend is an aficionado of something particular, you might want to contribute to her collection. You can gift her a portrait of her or something that has both of you captured. It could be something symbolic as well. Remember, women love small cozy things. If you want to keep her heart, don’t stop pampering her.
#10 She thinks you are about to break up with her
If during recent fights or conversations, you have told your girlfriend that you plan to break up with her if she doesn’t heed your words or take your advice seriously, she might feel that you are blackmailing her on account of leaving her.
No matter how tiring or testing the situation might become, you should not blackmail your girlfriend merely to prove your point. You must not make her do something that she doesn’t want to do or that she wouldn't have done had you not threatened her by blackmailing her to break the relationship.
The need to be in a sustainable relationship should come from both ends. Neither of the partners should be in a fix of terror of losing the other by their willingness. They must dread the thought of separation. Remember, when you make yourself comfortable with something that would sound terrible to a foreign ear, you convince yourself to accept it even if it were to happen in real.
Hence, never imagine things or say things in words that you might not want to make true in life. To understand more on this issue from this standpoint, read an engaging article by clicking on the link be - My Girlfriend Thinks I Will Leave Her.
#11 She is cheating on you
While the probability might not be as high as you might secretively wish, there is a chance that it is your girlfriend who is cheating on you and not vice versa. Your girlfriend might be playing reverse psychology on you. She is calling you a cheater and naming you a liar because, in truth, she is the one who lies and is cheating.
While you might be unaware of it, she might be preparing the grounds for her defense and keeping it ready beforehand. In the future, if you are to discover that your girlfriend cheated upon you, she will blame the situation and circumstance on you by calling herself lonely as you were busy elsewhere with someone else.
Such people are manipulating. You should never allow them to mess with your mind. When they begin to crap about such stuff, don’t entertain them. You cannot resort to ignorance here. You should say that you are a virtuous man and if she doesn’t believe in you and cannot prove you to be dishonest then she should either let the matter rest or leave you be.
#12 You slept with someone
If your girlfriend has discovered you sleeping with someone and if for some reason, she has forgiven you for it, remember that forgiveness is superficial. Deep inside, she is still fighting with herself every day, and hence, at every turn of events, she begins to blame you and call you names even if these things were in the past.
Now you know why people break up upon discovering that their partner has cheated on them in movies. It is because the one cheated on will never truly be able to put themselves in the shoes of the cheater and convince themselves of the fault enough to forgive them, and the person who cheated will always be guilt conscience so much that they would be stuck in a no man’s land.
Both of you, in this case, would be sabotaging your career, mental peace, and stability and keeping each other stranded by refusing to drag out of the situation. Mark my words when I say that going on a hiatus to take some time out from each other, going on random dates to see if you feel better or long for each other’s company, and then coming back to a relationship against all odds because you have realized that your heart belongs to each other is way better than trying to dig the entire care away.
#13 You are always the center of the eye
If you are always the center of attention no matter where you go, it might be due to your profession if you are a public persona, or because you are a people person, your girlfriend might be dating you for the wrong reason. She might be with you because you are so likable. She wants to steal your thunder or wants you to share the limelight with her.
However, if you like to keep your personal life low-key and hence avoid taking your girlfriend to big parties and scenes because you know that people are shallow and thirsty for gossip. Your girlfriend might even start hating you for the reasons for which initially she had loved you. That is if you are not a low-key person and your professional life interferes in your personal life so much so that it has invaded not only yours but also your girlfriend’s privacy and there are details that she would have never wanted to compromise on stand compromised.
Either way, you need to settle the concern by talking it out with your girl. You need to understand her concern and ask her how can you become a better boyfriend for her. What is better than asking the patient to describe his source of discomfort, right? That way, you will get absolute clarity regarding whatever might hypothetically be the issue here and find out a way from the condition, together.
#14 You are secretive about your phone
If out of nowhere, you have become secretive about your phone, that is, you don’t allow your girlfriend to touch your phone, or you have kept all the apps double protected and your phone and files encrypted, your girlfriend might raise serious issue with this need of keeping this covert.
It will make her uncomfortable and she might not imagine you as a spy out on a mission, but as a pervert and a cheater. She might imagine all kinds of possibilities, ranging from you keeping a file of things that must not be kept on the device as ready materials to exchange of conversations that must not be brought into the confidence of your girlfriend.
if by any chance, you had been preparing for a big day that is due in hand, say your girlfriend’s birthday or your yearly anniversary, she will feel awful when she discovers the facts. Hence, a surprise or a preparation of the same that can jeopardize your relationship is uncalled for, have no doubts about it.
#15 You flirt with other women
If you openly flirt with other women, your girlfriend might get pissed. While she might not have objected to it initially, hoping that one day you will stop, or because other guys would flirt with her and she would giggle, now that it has been a while, she gets uncomfortable.
There are certain parameters in a relationship that you must discuss openly not only before initiating the relationship but also on an ongoing basis. You need to try to understand here that the human heart is a fickle object which might not have a mind for one thing on one particular occasion but might create a mountain of rye on another.
There is also another important element that shows how compatible you are as a couple. This element is mutual understanding. Even if your girlfriend is refraining from saying something to you directly, you must get the vibe. That tension in her eyes just is visible to and detected by yours.
If you are failing to do that, it is not because you aren’t a god or because you don’t have telepathic abilities but because you don’t care. It indicates that you aren’t quite sharing that zone with your girlfriend yet. It is a sorry affair. You must make up your mind as to where you want to take your relationship from here on.
#16 You act different suddenly
If all of a sudden you have been acting strangely, that is, not texting your girlfriend in the mornings, not calling her at night, not sharing your business problems, not narrating the different issues that you might be facing in coping with your friends, your girlfriend might feel that there is someone else who has taken that spot in your lie.
Sometimes introspection can help us a great deal in fetching clarity regarding certain situations. These situations include behaving strangely without an unexplained cause. When you introspect and revisit your words, you will be able to find the flaw. Hence, don’t jump into a fight with your girlfriend when she calls you dishonest or labels you a cheater. Try to estimate the probable reason behind it. Getting defensive in such cases is never the wise option.
#17 You smell different
If a feminine touch and smell lurk about you, your girlfriend will be the first woman to detect it. If the smell is sensational and it's not her perfume, she will catch you. The only understandable cause is that you have been at an embracing distance from a woman.
Now either you can gift the perfume to your girlfriend and make some excuse about smelling that way or come up with a better reason. If this person like whom you smell is a good friend, an old colleague, your boss, or an ex, you owe your girlfriend an explanation because god forbid if she runs into her and makes the discovery, your relationship might be on the verge of an end.
What to do when your girlfriend accuses you of cheating and lying?
Be patient and try to understand what changed. She is not blabbering about anything. Either she is hurt or she is suspicious. Eager to jump into her love book again? Continue reading below to find out more.
#1 Talk to her
You need to understand the reasons behind such accusations because they are strong in character and put a strain on your character. Let’s keep the fact that you will be seeing your girlfriend for long or not aside and bother about the consequences that your girlfriend’s words might bring into your life.
None of the other women would want to deal with you on account of your girlfriend’s words, taking you to be a liar. Hence, it becomes important to have a precise understanding and hold of the reason.
Your girlfriend cannot possibly be accusing you of cheating because she dreamt of it. However, there are heavily superstitious people out there who would claim their dreams to be signals from the divine. If your girlfriend is a catholic or heavily religious by temperament, she might be one of them.
However, these are lame grounds and you must dump your girlfriend then and there for she makes up a fearful character. Therefore, rather than getting anxious about it or blaming yourself, the first thing to do is to interrogate your girlfriend on the grounds on which she is not even interrogating you but directly making her claims to you.
#2 Keep your phone unlocked
If all the rift and misunderstanding is occurring because you keep your phone locked, perhaps it is time to change that. I am not suggesting you compromise your privacy because there can be other people who mishandle your device but to keep it confidential to your girlfriend.
You can reset your lock with a symbol or a noun that means something to you and your girlfriend. It could be her name, which might not be a very smart choice because it is easily guessable by those who know you well or knows the name of your girlfriend.
It could be the name of the place where you first met or the name of the movie that you first saw. Anything that connects you with your girlfriend can be used up as the password to unlock your phone. She will be full of love and might think many times before doubting your intention from hereon.
#3 Appreciate her more
If your girlfriend feels ignored or neglected by you, perhaps it is time that you appreciate her more. You can appreciate her beauty by calling her beautiful, gorgeous, or stunning, whenever you address her. You can appreciate her intelligence by calling her the woman with brains. You can appreciate her as your support system by calling her your better half.
See how she reacts to and returns the favor. It will help you in understanding what to do and whether it is you who is at fault or whether your girlfriend has lost affection for you. It might be difficult to make a decision but some things are better to end if you feel you have lost the touch rather than trying to drag it onward merely from your end.
#4 Spend more time together
If you feel that spending more time together, recreating memories, making more memories, going on a staycation, or an outing might save your relationship then do it. Your girlfriend will get to observe you, see you in action, and catch your words while you are on a call with someone. She will take marked notice of how you explain to others where you are at the moment when you are with your girlfriend.
She will take pride when you tell others that you having a fun weekend or an outing with your girlfriend and you would appreciate it if they called you later. It will show her what she means to you. This is among the most important gestures in a relationship. The other person must feel that they mean something to you. They would know that you are being honest when it is not merely your words that appreciate them but your actions.
#5 Make weekly plans
Perhaps your girlfriend wants to see you every day to keep a check on you, while that might not be possible owing to your other commitments, you can promise to keep the weekends secured for her. Tell her that the weekends are wholly hers and you would not let anyone or any work mess that up.
Plan the weekend by asking her for suggestions and providing the same. Choose something that can be enjoyed by both of you as a couple. Go and pick her up before all the outings, women love that gesture. To know more about this, click on the link - My Girlfriend Wants to See Me Every Day.
#6 Stop flirting with other women
If one of the greatest reason for your girlfriend to feel insecure is your flirtation with other women who is either aware or not aware that you are committed then bring it to an immediate stop. If you share a special bond with your best friend, it will make your girlfriend insecure. Whenever the thought of flirting with other women occurs in your mind, think of how you would have felt had the tables been turned.
Never test the patience of the person who loves you. If you prefer to share things with your female best friend first, your girlfriend might fear and even hate her to some extent. Kindly offer her a break from all your female friends, or treat her as the Queen Bee among them. Once they start treating her the same way, she won’t mind them at all.
#7 Make your relationship official
If your girlfriend is having doubts and is skeptical about the status of your relationship or keeps questioning your commitment to her, try making your relationship official. This will stand as a proof against all odds of you being either a dishonest man or a cheater.
If your girlfriend hesitates to make it official then the flaw is in her. If your girlfriend agrees to it and accepts it with all affirmation, she is your woman to keep and you are her man. Remember, such insecurities are markers of a lack of trust. You must get over these initial hiccups as soon as possible to build a deep-rooted establishment with her.
#8 Do something fun together
When your relationship is going off the board or downhill, it is time to make it interesting with the help of doing something creative. This could be a range of activities such as painting your house, decorating certain corners, making an album of all the happy and cheerful memories, performing yoga together, going hiking, throwing tea parties, dressing up like your favorite characters, going to the movies, et cetera.
When you spend time doing fun activities, and make your girlfriend your creative partner, perhaps try cooking or baking together, it will add a fun element to your relationship. This will keep the disastrous elements off the shore and you will be able to channel all your negative energy into something happening.
Remember, when you focus on someone’s negatives, you will get those in plenty. The real task is to concentrate on someone’s positivity and see the beauty in them. When you are good with someone, they are good to you. Hence, when you spend good moments with your girlfriend, she will focus more on those.
#9 Introduce her to your friends
When you introduce your girlfriend to your friends, she can reach out to them for your information when you are unreachable over text or call. This is a wise option as this will bring complete transparency to your relationship. She will also get the encouragement to do the same and the boiling water will begin to settle.
Introducing your girlfriend to your friends will buy her confidence. She will have the surety that you cannot possibly be a shameless person who will break her heart before her friends. Your ego and pride will come into play here. It is a big and meaningful step and if you are certain to take it ahead with your girlfriend, nothing should stop you from doing it.
#10 Take her to meet your parents
If you have been dating for a long time and if you were best friends first or if your parents are aware of your relationship, perhaps it is time to introduce your girlfriend to your parents. It will give a boost of reassurance to your girlfriend. Your parents will be delighted to meet her too. It shall be a win-win scenario for you. There is nothing to fear or lose.
This is the strongest of what a gesture could be. You take it one step at a time and rather than making it a surprise for your girlfriend, you can hold her hands and ask her what she would feel about this. Take the step only when she tells you that she is not only comfortable but also keen to do so.
#11 Kiss her forehead
Sometimes all that your girlfriend truly needs is a kiss on her forehead to shush her down. She needs to feel that love. A forehead kiss is a very protective gesture. In that gesture, you are telling her that you will always have her back. There is no reason for her to fear you because she is your better half and you are ready to go to extremes to keep her happy.
Your girlfriend might not object to you wooing her. When she is complaining, she feels distant from you and wants you to bridge that distance. Hence, holding her face gently with your palms and kissing life into her is not a bad idea. Practice oral hygiene to keep her delighted. One thing can lead to another and all the unnecessary angst and deeply drugged emotions can be shoved away by an intimate love-making session.
#12 Hug her tight
Embracing your girlfriend while she calls you names is to show her that you have always been right there with her. It is an intimate move where you don’t want to keep any distance between you two. You also show her that you are not yet taking her words to your heart but giving her a chance to make amends. You are showing that you have a kind heart that will accommodate her despite her harsh behavior.
A hug can act as a quick to glue together the broken parts with a fine lining. You need to understand that all fights are not meant to be fought. Sometimes, fights are to be used as opportunities to get stronger together. You need to take fights as a healthy sign. It means that the person trusts you enough to fight with you. As long as she is taking the initiative to express her opinion, the ball is in your court. The moment she gives up the fight, you have lost her.
#13 Give her more attention
Perhaps all your girlfriend needs is more attention. She feels insecure. You can make a reminder on your phone. The way you should have at least a glass of water every hour, you must text your girlfriend that way too.
A simple text drop that says, “hey baby! I miss you.” or sending her voice notes or sharing your pictures or the picture of your surroundings or food could help too. She just needs to feel that she is there with you or not very far away from you.
Remind her of the cozy moments you had shared, and talk about the residual feelings that lasted even longer than you could have imagined. Tell her that that is how you figured out she is your girl because no one had ever made you feel that way before. Ask her to describe which are the most special moments in her diary that she has spent with you. This will give her thoughts a positive direction to focus on. If the thoughts don’t waver, things will be fine between both of you. After all, it is all in the mind.
#14 Work on your daily habits
With her morning without fail. Ask her every night how was her day. Keep reminding her to stay hydrated. Love her in every way. Try to work out or do yoga together so that you get to see and greet each other every morning. You can also catch up for evening tea or a late-night walk. Make your girlfriend a part of your routine so that she can take you to be hers permanently.
The practice is called religious devotion. You need to honor each other by willingly gracing and greeting. Momentary indulgence in dialogues that says, “Baby, I am nothing without you. All the time I am away from you is a waste. Every moment your guy yearns for you. Please come to see me soon and keep yourself well till the moment I can look after you with my own hands.” While the dialogue might sound cliche, it will help to strengthen your bond and dispel any negativity that might have been forming.
#15 Help her in staying busy
An empty mind is the devil’s mind. Your girlfriend needs to stay busier than she currently is. It will help in closing the window of unnecessary distraction away. You can enroll her in a course, involve her in a part-time job, or assign her some tasks to help you ease down your workload. That way, she will know what keeps you busy, and will not bother you much.
If you are in a long-distance relationship, you can take the help of your friends or browse what are the new things or events taking place in the town. You can book tickets for her and send them to her via email. She will appreciate the gesture because you went out of your way to help her here. It will keep her curiosity satiated and she would know that you are hers.
Your girlfriend must be deeply hurt if she calls you dishonest or a cheater. Rather than getting annoyed or firing back at her, subside your willingness to take revenge and try to deal with the situation maturely. Sit and talk this through with her politely. Try to understand what is the matter and figure out a solution that is agreeable to both of you at once. If that solution includes keeping her, then give your best in being the right man for a worthy woman. Whereas, if you feel you are unable to deal with this at the given moment, take a mindful break.