She Doesn't Want a Relationship but Acts Like My Girlfriend [Here's Why]She is scared of love. Her experiences have been such that the ability to love doesn't come easy to her. While she might have a strong liking for you, she might not express it in words.
Every girl has that special friend with whom she feels secure and behaves candidly. She will share all her secrets with this person and care for him limitlessly. The guy tends to feel that she has that soft corner for him that girls have for their boyfriends.
If you, too, have such a friend who treats you like a boyfriend but refuses to give you the title, worry not. We shall first figure out how she feels for you. After that, we will try to understand what we can do to bring you out of this puzzle.
Reasons why you feel she behaves like a girlfriend
It's about those sudden eye contacts, the gaze, the smile and blush, the way she dresses up when she hangs out with you, and the way she avoids going out with other guys. Precisely, the gestures make you feel that she behaves like a girlfriend.
Let us analyze the intensity and degree to understand where she is drawing the line and why.
#1 She likes you
She does everything that a person who strongly likes you would do. She is always on time or perhaps before time to see you. She will always try to corner herself with you. She tells you things that she doesn't share with others. She gives you the impression that she likes you but won't give it words.
She isn't sure if she likes you enough to love you well. She is still in the process of exploring more of you. This is new to her. She is learning. She feels something but wants to take her time before making hasty decisions.
#2 She is caring
She would always offer you first aid. She will keep reminding you to keep a check on your speed while driving. She will always drop a text to ask if you made it home safe. She never fails to wish you a good morning or a good night. She is immensely caring, and her care makes you feel that she is behaving like a girlfriend.
If you have watched the Flash, Iris cared for Barry the same way, and Barry thought she liked him. However, she thought of him as a brother. They were childhood buddies, and it never occurred to her that they could be lovers.
It was during a moment of crisis that she understood how much she loved Barry too. She couldn't imagine her life without him around. You have to wait for the right time. It has to come to her naturally. Wait for her to feel you.
#3 She understands you
If she is the one who understands your feelings and anticipates your reaction the way nobody else does, you might feel that she is your girl! However, she might have a great understanding of human psychology. She studies the patterns and behaviors of people and can judge them accordingly.
However, if it's only with you that she behaves in that manner and not with anyone else, it might mean that she is taking her time in understanding you deeper.
She might shortly accept that to understand a person completely, and you got to know them inside out.
#4 She checks on you
If she checks on you when you are not keeping well or offers you favors in tokens of kindness when in trouble, you might feel that she gives you special treatment because she has feelings for you.
However, it might be that she does it because it's not a big deal for her. You need to notice if she crosses her limits to reach out to you. If she does it, you're special to her.
#5 She gets jealous of your female friends
If she cannot stand your female friends or feel uneasy around them, it might be that deep inside; she has soft corners for you. She likes you, but since you already have many female friends or because you're popular among girls, she keeps her distance from you.
If you care for her and feel for her, don't keep yourself from expressing it. Hold her hands, look her in the eyes, and tell her those words.
#6 She sends you selfies
If a girl sends you selfies whenever she puts on a new dress or is engaged in some new activity, she might be close to you.
If she sends you random selfies day in and day out, and you can be certain that she doesn't send it to anybody else at the same time, she has feelings for you.
Tip: If she is sending you selfies on WhatsApp, she is sending them alone. However, if she sends it to you on Snapchat or Instagram, she has sent it to her other friends too.
#7 She bakes or cooks for you
If a girl takes time to cook or bake for you, you are special to her. My suggestion would be, don't push too hard. Let it come naturally to her.
She will realize why she doesn't mind going the extra mile for you. However, try to reciprocate the gesture in your way. Do things that would make her feel that she is special to you too.
Tips: If she is baking cake, you bring her favorite pizza. If she is cooking for you, you bring in desserts and drinks.
#8 She talks with you for long hours
If she takes time from her busy schedule to talk to you, if she doesn't complain of your rants or take interest even in the silliest talks you have to offer, you hold a special place in her heart.
Try to explain how great you would do as a couple, and slowly, she might reciprocate the gesture.
#9 She shares her secrets with you
If you are her secret sharer, you have to be someone special. Sharing secrets is a big deal. If she is open to you or doesn't think twice before revealing her secrets to you, it means that she trusts you blindly.
You must have given her strong reasons to enable her to trust you. This, in turn, suggests that you had had that soft corner for her way before she began sharing things with you.
#10 She always wishes you first
If she never forgets to wish you on your birthdays and she has been the constant in your life, you might feel there's something more to your bond. In such cases, you need to figure out if she does it for all her friends or you are the only exception.
Notice how long she stays on-call after wishing you. Does she urge you to meet you up and wish you in person? Does she dress up beautifully to meet you? These things will give you a better idea of how she feels about you.
Reasons why she doesn't want a relationship
We have figured out her behavior, now let's move on to the reasons why she chooses not to be in a relationship with you. It might be that while she likes you, she never thought you to be her lover. It hadn't occurred to her yet. It is not strange behavior.
But before arriving at a concrete decision, let us find out all the best possible reasons.
#1 She is afraid to lose the friend in you
She has never found a friend like you. It may be that she considers you to be her best friend. She thinks that if you two start dating and go wrong from there, she might lose you as a friend.
It is too precious a bargain to make. Hence, she prefers to keep the friend in you for life and has consciously or unconsciously settled for that.
#2 You don't make a gorgeous couple
She likes you, she wants to date you, she dreams about you, you make her smile, but you don't have a picture-perfect couple together. You don't look like you are made for each other. Consider your physique.
See how comfortable she feels while taking pictures with you. Do you make up an adorable couple? If not, work in that direction. Physical manifestation and readjustment of the body mass can be done easily.
#3 She has trust issues
A part of her trusts you, but the other part still feels that many things are not known to her. She has trust issues. It might be due to her past experiences. It might be due to the experiences of her friends. She knows that it is a fake world, and most human behavior is a facade.
Try to win her trust. Open up to her. Share more about your past and present. Involve her in your plans. That way, she will learn to believe you.
#4 She is broken
She was in a long-term relationship, and she is still trying to overcome it. She is vulnerable and broken and too scared to give it another attempt. She is taking her time out. She needs a hand. She wants to lean by, but she cannot bring herself to do it. Allow her some time to heal.
Give her love. Be there for her whenever she is down. Eventually, she will give you a chance. She will learn to love and trust again.
#5 She is not sure if you love her
She doesn't know how you feel for her. She doesn't want to make it awkward. She is waiting for you to take the first step. She likes you but would naturally need the reciprocation too. If you like her, don't keep her waiting for too long.
#6 She wants to keep it casual
She is not interested in relationships. The insecurity, possessiveness, and everything that a relationship leads to, all kinds of expectations and investments, is too much for her at this instant.
She is happy being your friend and supporting you in your time of need. However, don't lose hope. Once she is ready to give it a try, and if she genuinely feels for you, she will take her chances.
#7 You're too novice
She doesn't find you to be boyfriend material. Her needs might be different. She feels that you are better off as her friend. Try to understand her outlook and work on her needs to win her heart. Show her that you are far better than the guy she has been imagining.
#8 You're seeing someone else
If you are with someone else or if she feels that you are with someone else, that might be keeping her back from dating you. The best thing to do here is to clear any form of clouds and tell her about your feelings for her. If you are certain you want her, don't waste time and put it clearly before her.
#9 You have got a crush on her friend
If you crush her friend and she knows about it, it makes her uncomfortable, and she tries not to get too close to you. If you like her and not her friend, stop contacting them or staying in touch with them.
Show her that she means the world to you. Make her feel special and wanted. Talk with her through cute gestures and adore her with your eyes. She will not be able to keep herself from you for long if she truly likes you.
#10 You don't put effort into a relationship
If she has known you for a long time and has seen all your breakups and patch-ups, she knows you don't put effort into a relationship. That can put her off. She might have great expectations from her guy and might need continuous reassurance that he loves her and she means the world to her.
If you are too insecure yourself and you both are somewhat of the same temperament, it might be keeping her from taking her friendship a step forward.
Try to win her trust by overcoming insecurities. Show her that she is special.
#11 She is seeing someone else
She calls herself your friend because she is already seeing someone else. She might not have told you about it because she knows you like her. She perhaps likes you too, but since she is committed to someone already, she is being faithful.
Try to know her more, and you may directly ask her if there's someone in her life. You may also ask her what she looks for in a guy. You can then work in that direction and take steps to make your relationship more meaningful.
Tips to convince her to be your girlfriend
- Tell her how you feel but don't put it straight forward. Express it poetically. Be romantic. Please don't overdo it, but the right touch might do the magic. Please give her a surprise by presenting something thoughtful that she wouldn't have anticipated. A present should always come with a deep message of understanding. It should show that you know her and you care for her. The right present would make her think about you more.
- If you really want her to be your girlfriend, propose to her. Plan it out and do something simple and beautiful. The worst part could be rejection, but it would be better than being in the no man's land and hoping for things to change someday. If she likes you as a friend, she will accept you as the cause of her rejection. And if she wants to date you, nothing can keep her away from accepting your proposal.
- Write her a letter. Girls love to read letters. Write one down to her and express all your feelings in it. Don't make it too long. Rather make it poetic.
- Start acting like a boyfriend without calling yourself one. Engage in every activity that a boyfriend would do. Surprise her, take her out on dates, be her shopping companion, take her out for movies, browse books together. Be the constant in her life. Bring her stability. You both would start dating without naming it, and the whole world would know it without any need to express it.
If a girl behaves like a girlfriend but doesn't want a relationship, she is taking her time before making her call. She is undergoing the transition period and is stuck midway. Don't abandon her. Never abandon the person you love. Be patient with her, be consistent with her. She will make her way to you once the transition period is over.