My Boyfriend Likes a Different Body Type - What to Do?Your boyfriend is dating you for reasons that are far superior to physical. If you want to shape yourself the way your boyfriend would prefer, hit the gym. There is no reason to feel bad about it.
Everyone has certain body preferences. You will be amazed to find out how people drool at the sight of their favorite celebrity. However, that doesn't imply that you will be jealous of that celebrity or count yourself inferior to them.
These are the semantics of human psychology. One tends to desire that which takes work to be achievable. That is how the world of fantasy works.
When you discover that your boyfriend likes a different body type, don't panic.
In this blog post, I'll discuss what you should do if your boyfriend likes a different body type. Keep reading to find out more.
What should you do when your boyfriend likes a different body type?
Trying hard to make yourself comfortable in someone else's desired shape is unrealistic. We all have different shapes and sizes owing to various factors. Hence, your goal should be to stay fit and healthy rather than anything else.
Now how to do it and what to say, read below to find out.
#1 Don't get uncomfortable
The last thing you want to do is get uncomfortable under your skin. There has to be a reason why your boyfriend is dating you when he likes another body type. He keeps pushing you towards fitness and shares such posts and pictures to encourage you to get in better shape.
Liking another body type is not synonymous with not loving your body, or for that matter, your face. He adores you, but he can see the layer of visceral fat or the lack of flesh that would make any guy drool.
Don’t girls like guys with six-packs? Is there not a sudden urge to jump on them and make out when we see them? Certainly not. The idea is that making out with a fit person will enhance the romance because you can do things in various ways.
Hence, don’t get offended when your guy conveys his desires. He expects you to do the same. You, too, can share insights on what turns you on and keeps you warm. Trusting each other and having faith in one another’s guts is necessary. You must know where to look, how to speak, and how to appreciate. Hindering or restricting communication is not advisable.
#2 Give him space
If your boyfriend expresses his liking for another body out of annoyance, you must grow somewhat distant and give him space. This will help him to look around and understand the offer on the plate. We often don’t appreciate what we have because we are too distracted.
Your boyfriend might feel that you are curbing his movement by trying to control all that he likes to do. It would either mean that you are a toxic person or you don’t trust him enough. In the latter's case, the fear is understandable if he has broken your trust in the past. In the former, no matter how much he loves you, there will arrive a moment when he might decide to cut off strings.
The importance of providing space in a relationship should be considered seriously. It is acceptable if your boyfriend has hearty laughter with someone besides you. Brief flirtation keeps you young. However, something is lacking in the relationship if he needs to improve with you. It could be the way you keep yourself. If your boyfriend is a fitness freak, you must keep getting hotter for him.
#3 Express your type
When your boyfriend opens up about specifications, he reveals his darkest desires to you. There is nothing wrong with doing so. You have some specifications you want to convey to him, and you can do it too.
Even if you don’t have any physical attribution that you are too particular about, there might be something about his conduct that you find distasteful or wish would have happened otherwise. You can use this opportunity to tell him about it.
#4 Laugh at the ridiculing notion of keeping a type
The idea of “what is your type” is mostly ridiculed by millennials. They respond to the question by telling the other their blood group. The point of understanding over here is that there are certain qualities we all look for in our partners.
There is nothing too exclusive about these qualities because we deal with human beings. No matter how unique we are, we share a collective sensibility with the rest.
What we desire is a set of qualities. A relationship thrives when we get accustomed to each other’s dynamics. The goal shouldn’t be to change the individual.
#5 Ask him what he likes about you
When your boyfriend comes up with a list of inches he desires in a body, ask him what he likes about your body. Because ultimately, it is you who is and will be sharing the bed with him. If you feel he is trying to drive at a point here, be straightforward in your confrontation. Ask him, “what is your point? Are you telling me I’m not good enough for you?”
Communication is important. Even if you feel a miscommunication or a communication gap, initiate the conversation. A general practice you can make is to begin the conversation with a suggestion or advice rather than opening it up with a hard-hitting question. An interrogation might make the person feel uncomfortable. Hence, narrate an episode to him and ask him what he would have done had he been in that place. Or, ask him to provide his feedback on the situation.
#6 Learn to appreciate each other more
It will help if you practice gratitude. Being thankful for what you have and who you are is important. Learn to exchange two words of fondness regularly with each other. This will help to keep any negative thoughts or doubts away. It will also encourage you to open up with each other more. You won’t be skeptical about each other’s intentions, actions, or words.
Expressing gratitude is a practice you should indulge in regularly. Don’t waste your time by overanalyzing the situation. It will bring happiness.
#7 Find out the body type of women he has dated in past
If you feel your boyfriend is missing someone from the past, you should learn more about his exes. You might be shocked to discover that you resemble his exes or are in total contrast with them.
If it is the former, he was trying to replace them with you. This would mean that it was a one-sided romance. He might be using you to get over his ex. The breakup is either young or old. He never took time for a grieving period.
If it is the latter, he is trying to forget that person. She broke his trust, and he wants to bury all the memories simultaneously. However, when making out, picking up clothes with you, or doing laundry, he might get a flashback of certain intimate moments that might cause him to spell insensitive things.
#8 Strive for fitness (clean eating habits, regular at the gym)
Your boyfriend might be taunting you because he is tired of your boring eating habits. He wants you to look after yourself. You have a laidback attitude which he finds to be very annoying. Hence, he has decided that whenever you crawl on his nerves, he will make an insensitive remark to hurt you.
This is not a healthy sign of a relationship. If anything, it is a warning that things are going in the wrong direction. Try and either work on yourself or break up with your boyfriend. Don’t let him treat you in an ill manner. You deserve someone who can find better ways to reach out to you.
#9 Be realistic (don't be deluded that your boyfriend will like everything about you)
When we indulge too much in happy endings and romantic plots, we compromise our understanding of right and wrong. We fail to see the lines, demarkations, and justice. As a result, we keep such high-marked ambitions that we need to stay grounded.
Setting up expectations from yourself is fine, but it is wrong to expect in extremities from others. You shouldn’t be surprised that guys drool at the sight of large breasts, swinging hips, and skinny legs. Their expectations of a woman’s body composition are unrealistic. Hence, when your boyfriend tells you about the kind of body he likes, imagine him making out with a doll.
While not harmful initially, making out with a doll could be eradicated in the long run. You will be shocked to find out one day that he keeps a doll to please himself. Statistics show that guys tend to do it. Remember, the obsession with a certain physique comes from glamour. Celebrities earn their livelihood by maintaining that figure. They diet and work out almost all the time they are awake. And they hardly get any sleep. They are also on all kinds of immunity boosters and drugs that help them to maintain that figure. The procedure is expensive and not so healthy in the long course.
Hence, if a person is trying to change you, abandon them. They are not your folks. They can never love you.
#10 Don't get sentimental
In today's fast-moving world, even the one you are dating and are capable of dating has become a part of the rat race. Hence, it finally adds up to your status quo. When your boyfriend dates you but does not make you feel special, he might not be dating you for the right reasons.
Hence, getting sentimental over a remark made by your boyfriend will bring you no peace. Instead, pull yourself together and learn to practice reason. When you channel your thoughts with the help of rationalization, you will be able to ground human behavior into an overarching understanding of different psychological dynamics. These dynamics will help you stay calm and look at things more clearly.
#11 He is cheating on you
You cannot underestimate the possibility that your boyfriend might be cheating on you, and hence he has this specimen of another body type always running in his mind. You might need to have a dialogue with him in this regard.
If he is hesitant, as he is already rude and making insensitive comments, he is crossing the line. You might try stalking him and his accounts. This will show you who the people interested in his life, and vice versa, are.
Remember, moving on in life is never easy, but it becomes necessary. Hence, when the situation demands it, you must take the call. Never let anyone take a toll on your happiness, dignity, and peace.
To know more about this, click on the link - My Boyfriend Hasn’t Texted Me All Day.
#12 He treats you as a sidekick
When a guy treats you as a sidekick, he is not serious about you. It could also imply that he is dating multiple women simultaneously or hunting for the one he can label "his type."
Such guys are disgusting and would never know how to treat women respectfully. For them, women are a means to satisfy their hunger. They love to objectify women.
Men who treat women as a commodity can never keep their ladies happy.
You will discover that they are selfish in bed too. Hence, gather yourself and move on to someone who treats people equally. One way to know if he takes you for granted is by noticing how much effort he puts into your special days. To know more about this, click on the link - Boyfriend Makes No Effort on My Birthday.
#13 Your guy poses as an influencer
If your guy is a social media influencer or an Instagram addict, he might be so fixated on body shapes and size that he couldn't help not sharing it with you. In this regard, he is merely sharing his opinion.
You must understand that he is trying to do business out of this. It would help if you tried to be more supportive in this regard. He might want you to pose as a hot couple along with him. After all, which guy doesn't like to flaunt his girlfriend?
Does body shape matter in a relationship?
The body's shape has to be desirable to keep couples attracted to each other. Both partners look at each other when bored. It doesn’t necessitate that they don’t love their partner anymore.
This sense of boredom can be fought when you hit the gym together, practice yoga together, and indulge in various adventure and sports activities. It will help because, with the passing of every day, you both will become fitter and obtain a hotter body. Eventually, you will raise the bar and set high couple goals. So yes, body shape matters in a relationship, and you must know how to use it as leverage to strengthen your relationship.
The most important thing is to feel comfortable under your skin. And if you don’t feel that comfort, your partner must help you by motivating you in the right manner rather than taunting you or letting you down in any way. Hence, make sure that the guy you date becomes your pillar of strength, not your weakness.