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My Boyfriend Thinks I Don't Love Him (Here's Why and What to Do)

You haven't spent enough time with your boyfriend yet to make him feel loved. You hesitate in getting close to him, and he feels that you don't trust him. Spending quality time with your guy doing couple things will help him in overcoming his insecurities.A couple cuddling together inside a room

Love is a complicated thing. Confessing it once is never enough. We need to give reassurance that we are still in love with them today as much as we were yesterday, if not more.

You can't blame your boyfriend if he thinks that you don't love him. The culture has been such that it has reduced us into petty, insecure stuff toys altogether where we are always questioning our worth and role in the life of others.

However, worry not. We are going to figure out the exact reason why your guy feels that you don't love him and prepare a customized remedy for you at the same time.

Reasons why your boyfriend feels you don't love him

Your boyfriend feels that you don't love him because you have been neglecting him for some time. While you might not do it deliberately, remember, it's important to make out time for the love of your life.

I've shared a few more reasons that could make your boyfriend feel so. Find out which one is applicable to you and set at once to fix it.

#1 You don't share your thoughts with him 

If you don't share or have suddenly stopped sharing your thoughts with your boyfriend, that is to say, if you have suddenly become more reserved or less chatty, your boyfriend might feel that something is wrong between both of you.

He might overthink and conclude that you don't love him any longer. 

Dispel all his worries by opening up to him at once. Tell him about your day. Ask him about his days. Don't be ignorant towards him lest it shall create misunderstandings. 

When you love your man, make it your duty to remind him of your love religiously.

#2 You hesitate in making love with him 

If you hesitate or have suddenly started hesitating (which, by the way, make it worse) in making love with your boyfriend, it shall definitely give him unwanted vibes.

He might feel that you are emotionally invested somewhere else or that your ex is back in your life. 

He might get irrational in his reasoning, and you will not be able to blame him for it. When you love a person, you ought to feel comfortable with him.

If you are indeed hesitating in making love with him, then before explaining your boyfriend, try to understand yourself where you are going wrong. You should know the cause for this hesitation.

If you have trust issues, fix them. Don't break his heart unnecessarily and unconsciously. Know your feelings.

#3 You don't take his name while making love 

If you don't call out your boyfriend's name while getting intimate or if you stumble in recalling his name while making out, it is not only a major turn-off but also alarming.

It might definitely arouse doubts in his mind. Moreover, it becomes all the more important for you to understand why you face such difficulty

Even if you face difficulty in remembering names (many people do, myself included) but that doesn't mean that you can let the name of your boyfriend slip from your mind.

It only suggests that you don't take him seriously or at least shall suggest so. The only way to amend this is to take his name in all the ways possible the next time you get the opportunity.

#4 You haven't opened up about your past yet 

If you haven't shared details about your past, it's high time you do it. Significant details about the memorable moments or dreadful ones, the people you dated, the struggles you went through, all these help couples to get into one another's skin. 

Your boyfriend feels that you don't love him because you haven't yet told him about the moments that got into your making. The moments which brought you this far. These moments shall be significant not only to you but also to him. 

He will know how to treat you better. It will tell him what the things that can trigger you are. Help him be a nicer boyfriend. He will not only feel loved but also learn to love you with his all.

#5 You haven't made your relationship official 

If you haven't made your relationship official, it might cause some misunderstanding in your relationship. Your boyfriend might feel that you don't want to make it official because you don't love him. 

If you have strong reasons that have been preventing you from making an open declaration to the world about your love, express it before him.

Find out a solution together. He will either come up with a suggestion or let go of his doubts.

#6 You don't spend time with him 

If you don't spend quality time with your boyfriend, it can be a disappointing experience for him and might lead to unwanted, unnecessary thoughts. 

No matter how busy you are, until and unless it's a matter of life and death, learn to take out time for your boyfriend

When you spend time with him, do things that make both of you feel blissful. Engage yourselves in fun activities. Spending time together shall dispel all the dark clouds and give much-needed assurance to your partner.

#7 You don't talk like a girlfriend 

If you are superficial in your conversation with your boyfriend, that is, if you don't empathize with him on a deeper level or fail to touch the chords of his heart, he might feel unloved.

The conversation between partners should cover a wide number of emotions. It should not be monotonous or tedious. 

Be candid with your boyfriend. Express your love in words. If you're not good at articulating emotions, send them memes and gifs to express your feelings. Start sending 'miss you' texts daily. 

#8 You never put effort to please him 

Your boyfriend feels that you don't love him because you never put effort to please him. He might feel that it's a one-sided love.

Getting into a relationship is momentary. Maintaining it with love and effort must be consistent.

You must not be rude to your boyfriend. Learn to reciprocate his gestures with the same intensity. He should not feel that it is not coming wholeheartedly from your side.

#9 You forget his birthday 

If you don't remember the special days in your boyfriend's life, such as his birthday, he might feel unloved.

We crave to cherish the important days of our special ones together. However, if you don't express excitement or don't show up with balloons and gifts to pamper him on his birthday, he might feel naturally bitter.

Even if you're pessimistic and you don't like celebrating your birthday, you're bound to celebrate the ones you love.

#10 You are closer to your guy best friend 

If your best friend is not your boyfriend, and if your best friend is a guy, your boyfriend must get extremely uncomfortable when you share your time with him or when you feel more comfortable sharing your feelings with your best friend rather than your boyfriend.

You must not make your boyfriend feel left out. Even if you feel more comfortable sharing your feelings with your best friend, you must first share them with your boyfriend.

Give him an opportunity to understand your feelings and to comfort you. 

#11 You don't click pictures together 

If you don't click pictures with your boyfriend, he might feel that you are not happy with him or you don't like the idea of posing as a couple with him.

This shall make him uncomfortable and arouse all sorts of doubts in his mind.

If you have never thought of this, or if you don't have any such feelings, start clicking pictures in different poses and share them on social media.

If you are not comfortable putting it in your feed, share it in your story with limited viewers. This shall give him an affirmation that you like to be with him.

It is important for him to feel that it's not a mere fling between you two.

#12 You only take his calls at night

If you only answer your boyfriend's call in the silence of the night, he might feel that you are conditioning your relationship.

Imagine if he had done the same to you. You would have your doubts about him, wouldn't you?

When you love someone, you don't limit yourself to a particular time clock, and you try to stay available for them round the clock. You don't condition your love because if you condition it, it is not love.

What to do if your boyfriend feels you don't love him?

Overwhelm your boyfriend with love in all the ways possible if at any time in your relationship there arises an iota of doubt in his mind about your love for him.

While there are many ways to do it, it's best not to stick to a single one. Try combinations of these so that it never becomes monotonous.

A constant reminder of how much he means to you, along with simple efforts, shall do the magic. Make love when you are together, write a love letter when you are away. Choose your pick from the points discussed below.

#1 Spend more time with him 

Spending quality time with your boyfriend will give him confidence and control his wavering thoughts. When you spend more time with a person, you understand their likes and dislikes. 

You learn about the gestures that comfort them. You begin to share a zone that is special and limited to the two of you. Ultimately, it's this zone that makes you a successful couple.

#2 Surprise him 

Giving a sweet surprise to your boyfriend, such as dressing up in his clothes, baking his favorite cake, showing up at his place with his favorite bottle of scotch, these little things ought to make a big difference. It keeps the relationship exciting and reignites the feeling of love all over again.

#3 Make love 

Make super crazy love with your guy if he ever doubts your love for him. Take charge. Dominate and control him. Love him limitlessly. Be creative in your moves.

Do things that he wouldn't have anticipated. Most importantly, never fail to try something new. Love can never escape if you keep making love to one another.

#4 Write love letters to him 

Writing love letters can never be unromantic from the first day you started dating to this day.

Pen down your fondest memories and gift them to him. Tell him about things that made you feel special and kept you along with him in the first place.

Articulate your words in such a way that he gets flashbacks of those moments and realizes your deep-seated love for him.

#5 Make it official 

Making your relationship official can definitely boost up the confidence of your boyfriend. He would get the affirmation that you feel him.

It shall take away all his insecurities. He will trust you and feel loved again. However, don't do it if you are not completely certain that you want him to be a part of your life.

#6 Introduce him to your friends

Introducing your boyfriend to your friends can have a soothing effect on the mind of your boyfriend. He will feel secure.

When he knows the kind of people you surround yourself with, he gets to know you better. It also reassures him that you don't have second thoughts about him. He would know that you love him as your friends know about him. 

#7 Go on a staycation 

Taking a break from the robust life and going on a staycation with your boyfriend comes with many advantages.

Besides allowing you to spend unflinching hours together, it will create a mutual understanding between both of you. How you respond to different situations and make your call, among other things.

#8 Go for a live-in 

A live-in relationship can make your relationship way stronger and close all the loopholes of doubts about your love for one another. 

When you choose to share the same roof with someone, it means that that person is special to you. It suggests that you are ready to make adjustments and bear their tantrums. There won't be any room for any little talks or unnecessary doubts.

#9 Bake him a cake 

Baking cakes for your boyfriend or baking cakes together is a very sweet thing to do.

Making way to his heart through his stomach and showing him that you know his likes and dislikes well. 

Such gestures speak louder than words and are priceless. It shall help you sail through the highest of tides. You will be stronger and better together.

#10 Dress up for him 

Dressing up for your guy is the most romantic thing ever. It can either lead to roleplay or a romantic dinner date.

Make him adore your curves and admire your pose. Give him time to be proud and feel blessed that you're his girl. 

If your guy feels sexy with you, he will never question your love for him. Wear his favorite color and make him Don your favorite tie.

#11 Spoil him with love 

Love him so much that he can't complain. Get absolutely obsessed with him. Know him inside out.

Help him in doing the interiors of his house. Go shopping together. Help him in sorting out his groceries. Watch each other's favorite movies and shows. Make a new photo album of the best times spent together.

The list can go on and on. Do everything it takes to make some extra room in places where he used to stand alone.

#12 Engage in his hobbies 

Taking a keen interest in your partner's hobby is a strong sign of love.

It shows that you do not love him for a single quality, but you accept him for all that goes into his making. That is the highest form of love out there.

To love a person in totality for all he represents. When you begin to participate and engage in his hobbies, he would know that you have become two bodies and one soul.

#13 Tell him about your past 

If you have been dating your boyfriend for quite some time not, but you haven't opened up to him about your past, it's high time you do it.

Avoid keeping secrets in relationships. Your partner should know you inside out. That is the only way he would empathize and feel one with you. If you stay elusive and keep s mysterious air about you, it will be very difficult for him to feel loved or give love.

#14 Plan your future together 

When you make plans together, and those plans are directed to your future, happiness, and wellness, no one can feel unloved or less loved. Plan out your future with him. Take baby steps. Ask him about his goals and tell him about yours.

Plan ways to make it work. When you plan your future together, you give him a green flag that you're in for a long-term relationship rather than a fling.

#15 Video call more often 

In the age of technology, use it more often to your benefit. Even if you are unable to spend much time with your boyfriend or something is preventing you from sharing physical space with him, switching to video calls from normal calls can take you a long way.

On the video call, you will be able to read each other's body language, and it will help you in understanding better what the other person is trying to convey to you.

Even when you're lost on words, you will be able to express your love for one another through your expressions.

Summing up 

If your boyfriend feels that you don't love him, rather than breaking into a fight with him or engaging him in arguments, show your love to him.

There are a great many ways to do it. Try to recall how it all started in the first place. Which act of yours did he appreciate the most. Sometimes, it's absolutely fine to begin from the beginning.

Make him feel that you are there for him and you are ready to put all the efforts possible to make him feel loved.

Suprity Acharyya


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