What Does It Mean When a Guy Wants to Bite You? [ANSWERED]

If you think in general terms, biting can be an act of aggression, often used to attack someone or defend oneself. It is not even a very human thing to use biting in a fight. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, biting gets a whole new meaning.

It becomes a way of showing your affection to your partner. If a guy wants to bite you, it means he wants to experiment with ways to turn you on. He also probably wants to leave a mark on your body. 

In relationships, biting can be a playful thing. With consent, it can become a source of pleasure for you and your partner.

You are here, looking for answers to your question because you still don’t get the idea. The word “biting” scares you. If you have a biting-related trauma from your past relationship, it will be particularly difficult for you to buy the concept. You are probably looking for reasons; you want to peek into his mind. Let’s do that together.

Why would a guy want to bite you?

If a guy wants to bite you, there could be a number of reasons for that. But in most cases, he bites because he finds it sexy. Biting turns him on. And, without the knowledge of your perspective, he thinks you like it too. 

He thinks you love wearing the love bites because his ex-girlfriends loved them. There can be so many more reasons, but they are hidden in the convoluted spirals of his mind. We can’t only attempt to explore a few of them. I have enlisted some in the following bullets. Dive in.

#1 It turns him on

Biting is his thing. It turns him on. To be more specific, it’s his kink. If you have been with this guy for some time now, you will know that whenever you make out with him, he does that weird nibbling thing on your neck, lips, and ears. The nibbling gains intensity with each passing second.

If biting turns him on, it will be difficult for him to control that once he is in the zone. Sometimes, unknowingly, he might even end up crossing the line, which will lead to an injury. That’s where you come in. You should not let him do that.

A little bit of playful biting can be a source of pleasure in a relationship. However, when it starts getting close to violence, one needs to stop; one needs to be stopped.

#2 He thinks it turns you on

Right in the beginning of your relationship, he must have read somewhere that biting can help to turn on your partner. He did that once. You found it weird but kept the thought to yourself as it was a new relationship. Now he thinks you like it and applies the trick whenever you guys make out.

It’s a fact that biting works for many people. Some people even experiment with it. Some are gentle, while others are a bit violent.

Everyone has their own set level of playful biting. Finding it weird is absolutely fine, and that doesn’t mean you hate it. Maybe, you don’t really like the way he does it. You can talk to him about that.

#3 He loves to leave a mark

Based on a person’s intentions, this can either be adorable or; it can be dangerous and creepy. He bites you because he wants to leave a mark on your body. He might even want you to bite him for the same reason.

Some people love to wear their hickeys, especially when they are in a new relationship. It’s their way of saying, “Look! I’m dating someone.” When you bite each other and leave marks on each other’s bodies, it’s kind of adorable. You do that to show off your relationship among your peers.

When any one of you does that, just to mark territory, it crosses the line of sanity. It’s a giant red flag. 

Your boyfriend leaves marks on your body. If he does that to mark you as a property that belongs to him, it’s definitely a red signal. This person is probably not in love with you. He wants to entrap you into a strange relationship where you will be a part of his weird sexual fantasies. Stay away from this guy.

#4 He likes your skin

He bites you because he likes your skin. This, too, is a weird fetish. Why should someone like your skin so much that he wants to bite you?

It clearly points towards cannibalism. If you have seen the series called Hannibal, starring Mads Mikkelsen and Hugh Dancy, among others, you will know what I am talking about. The protagonist (or should I say antagonist?) of the show, Dr. Hannibal Lector, feasted on people, and some of them were his potential love interests. For him, each person tasted different.

Scared yet?! There is no need to freak out. The guy you are worrying about is not a cannibal (although you can’t be 100% sure).

Jokes apart, he is just another guy who has successfully finished comparing you to a fuzzy food item and now thinks your skin is like ice cream. Comparing a person to food is not a very acceptable thing to do. If you are not okay with this, ask him to change his point of view.

#5 His ex liked it

His ex liked it; that doesn’t mean you will like it too. Due to your lack of communication, he has acquired the idea that you love it when he bites. He has no clue about the fact that you find it extremely weird. So much so that it has brought you here to find answers.

His ex was probably the person who loved to show off the love bites in front of their friends. For them, it was a way to prove the heat they had in their relationship. Not just his ex, probably even he liked to show off the hickeys.

Your boyfriend and his ex were probably into all kinds of weird stuff. That is what they bonded over. However, your relationship with him is built upon something totally different, and that is far removed from strange sexual fantasies.

#6 He is aggressive

Now, that might be a problem. Whenever you guys make out, he tends to turn excessively violent. The beginning of a make-out session can be passionate; it can have a lot of swiftness; to be precise, it is action-packed.

But that’s where you have found the problem. This guy we are talking about is an over-excited dude who gets carried away and crosses the threshold into the land of violence very quickly.

He begins biting you, and that biting intensifies as he transitions from passionate to violent. It is a problem because it can call for an unwanted injury. 

The bite can even cause a permanent scar on your body. You don’t need to take that. If you are uncomfortable with the situation, have a conversation about it with this guy and tell him to control his emotions a bit.

#7 He thinks it is cute

He thinks he looks cute when he bites you. I know, it’s a weird thought, but what to do? The human mind works in mysterious ways.

Your boyfriend’s mysterious mind makes him bite you while making out, and your mind finds it extremely weird.

Playful nibbling while making out is an adorable thing, but some people confuse it with plain biting. If he finds the act of biting “cute,” he probably still thinks he is nibbling at your neck without hurting you in any way. If you are hurt, you can stop him immediately.

#8 He likes to experiment

If you have been in a relationship with this guy for a while, you will know that he likes to conduct experiments.

He has got weird sexual fantasies, and along with that, he has grown too comfortable around you. Due to a lack of communication between you guys, he thinks you are perfectly okay with his experiments.

Biting while making out is probably an experiment he is conducting to see how it affects your relationship. He heard about it from someone or must have read it somewhere and now is applying it in your intimate moments. 

He wants to see if it turns on the heat between you guys. If you are not okay with this, he will probably respect your decision and stop it at once.

What can you do?

Your confusion about the concept of playful biting brought you here. If you are new to this biting thing, try it once; if you like it, you can go with the flow. If you don’t, you can always ask him to stop. However, if you have experienced this, and that experience is the source of trauma for you, communicate with him about that before getting physical.

What else can you do? Do you need to set boundaries? What if the bite makes you bleed? What should you do then? I have some ideas that could help you deal with this situation. Read on.

#1 Let him know if you like or dislike the idea

He likes biting while making out. That doesn’t mean you will have to like it too. If you are uncomfortable with the idea, you can always let him know. The conversation is the key in situations like this.

Even if you are interested in the idea, you can have issues with how he is doing it. You can let him know how and where you want him to bite. 

When it comes to biting while making out, some people are passionate, and they bite each other like there is no tomorrow. However, the ones who are on the gentler side of things love to nibble on each other for pleasure.

If you guys have conflicting interests in this area, you can always opt for a middle ground. You can gently be wild.

#2 If you are adventurous, there is no harm to try it out

You find the concept of biting while making out weird and ridiculous. But you have not yet tried it. If you are an adventurous person, you can always try out new things.

Try to experiment with ways to turn each other on and spice up the relationship. He wants to bite you because that turns him on.

He finds it to be the most intimate act between two people. He also may think it is cute. Even if you don’t feel any of it, you still can try. There is no harm in trying something out. You can always go back to not liking it if you don’t feel comfortable biting each other.

#3 Ask him to be gentle

If he is being too intense with the biting thing when you are making out, it may cause more harm than you can think of.

He might not be doing this intentionally, as in moments like this, people often lose control of themselves and end up inadvertently hurting one another.

You can remind him to be gentle when he bites you. Have a conversation about this whenever you guys are not busy. Tell him about your inhibitions. You can even ask him to stop the moment you feel uncomfortable.

#4 Talk to him about your trauma

Past relationships often add trauma to our lives. The trauma can be a mental one, and sometimes it can even be a physical one.

As I have said earlier, biting is a common romantic gesture. People who are attracted to each other often tend to bite one another to ignite passion in their relationship. But there is a limit to everything, even to a romantic gesture that apparently seems harmless.

If your trauma from the past relationship is related to biting, then getting into it with this new person will be immensely difficult. Whenever he will try to bite you playfully, it will make all the uncouth thoughts come back to your mind. It will be difficult for you to deal with the idea, and that is understandable.

Talk to him about your trauma. Explain why you are not so much into the act of biting one another. He deserves an explanation. Such deep conversations can bring you guys closer than ever.

#5 Stop him if you don’t feel comfortable

Not every person is alike. Even if you guys are in a relationship, there will be some fundamental differences between you two. He bites while making out, while you wish to steer clear of that path.

Muster up your courage and just tell him that you dislike the feeling when he bites you. When you are uncomfortable about something that can be avoided, you need to put that into action. 

Biting is not an utmost necessity in a relationship. Feeling uncomfortable is absolutely normal, and when you feel like that, you definitely should stop him from biting you.

#6 Confront him if he draws blood

Biting turns you on. Biting ignites passion. Biting is cute. But violence is not. Biting while making out is a perfectly normal action until he turns violent, and that leads to bleeding. Confront him sternly if he draws blood.

A sexual encounter in a relationship is solely built upon consent. You allowed him to do certain things with your body, and he allowed you to do the same. But when he crosses the threshold of sanity and bites you in a way that makes you bleed, you will have to stand up for yourself.

When a make-out session turns into a bloody one, it is the most unfortunate thing. Ask him why he was not careful enough. Make it clear that he is not allowed to draw blood when he bites you “playfully.”  Set strong boundaries that are not meant to be breached at any cost.

#7 Ask him not to leave marks if you don’t like hickeys

Some people love hickeys. They love to show that off to their peers to assert the fact that they are in a considerably passionate relationship.

Remember Monica from the second season of F.R.I.E.N.D.S? She proudly showed off her hickey, from last night’s encounter with a popular band member to her friends.

Some people hate to have hickeys. For them, they are nothing but reddish embarrassments on their necks that draws everyone’s attention.

If you don’t like hickeys, ask him not to leave marks on your neck or any other place that is easily visible. 

If he questions your statement, explain your reasons politely. He will definitely understand your situation if he is a sensible person.

#8 Bite him back

It’s a two-way street. If he bites you, you should bite him back. Repeating an action can be a great way to teach someone a lesson. You don’t find the act of biting your partner while making out very amusing.

He, on the other hand, is too much into biting. If that irritates you, you can bite him back in the exact same way he does that to you.

However, I must say, this is the least effective way to deal with the situation. If you bite him back, he might even like it and intensify his biting actions. But the surprising part is, once you are out of your inhibitions, you can attempt to enjoy the action. Who knows? You can even end up liking it.

Summing up

Biting in relationships happens when people want to spice things up. Your partner wants to bite you, probably because he wants to turn you on. 

He wants to leave a mark on you. He feels comfortable enough to show his truest self to you. If you don’t buy the concept, you can always communicate about that with him. 

Communication can find solutions to almost every kind of problem. It can bring answers to the biggest confusions.