When a Guy Keeps Asking If You Are Okay (Meaning & What to Say)The guy looks at himself as a problem solver. He might even be a sugar daddy for a few. He likes to see women vulnerable. It helps him in reassuring himself of his masculinity. There are a lot of shallow people and it is better to keep away from them.
While we all are dumb and broke, few people love to play the Messiah in the lives of others. They will pretend to be checking on you but might be gossipmongers in real life. Your misery might be a plaything for them. If not, they would have been working in the post of a police inspector for real.
Hence, read below to understand why a guy might keep asking you if you are okay. Is it your behavior that probes the question or is it something about them that makes them do it?
Reasons why a guy keeps asking you if you are okay
Perhaps whenever you bumped into the guy, it has been when you were in dire need of help or it appeared to be so. If you are a person with a messy personality and he is a guy who fusses at every displaced object, this might happen a lot.
Read below to find out more such probable reasons that might match up with the guy in question.
#1 You don't look okay
If a pot of coffee is poured all over you, or you are having a bad hair day, or your clothes are not pressed, or you are going haywire finding your object, such a question might seem pressing to any person concerned.
It also depends on when you meet and how often you get to see each other. If the guy has ever seen you crying, every time he meets you again, he will ask you this. She might be scared for your life. There is a possibility that he might have lost someone in the past due to which all the anxiety by finding anyone in discomfort pents up regardless of the connection.
You will be able to see the beauty in it when you understand the reason deeply.
#2 He knows you are ill
If he visits the same physician as you or if he took his girlfriend to the same gynecologist where you went too, and he spotted you all by yourself, alone and distressed, and he shares the workplace with you or knows you back from school days, he might not hesitate in checking up on you.
He has a strong feeling that you are not only sick but also lonely. Perhaps he just wants you to know that you are not alone and he has your back.
He wants to be useful. It could be in the capacity of a friend by taking you to doctors, getting you medicines, or being with you at the time of reports.
These are the nuances of a noble heart. They can sense when a human is in need. They don't have any biases that keep them anti to others. They are hilarious people who like to live life beautifully.
Perhaps give this guy an opportunity and open your heart to talk to him, you never know you might be inflicted by something unknown that might be put to ease with a good talk.
#3 He is genuinely concerned
If these words are coming from a friend, it means he likes to check on you from time to time. Why is it recurring in nature? It is because he is under the impression that you have had a recent loss and you might be fighting against giving in to your sentiments.
Your friend understands the importance of the grieving period. One must always submit to it by shedding tears as and when needed. If you lost a family member, or your pet, or you had a breakup with your boyfriend or best friend, this guy is trying to express that he is rooting for you.
Such people should not be easily tossed away. Even if you find their words annoying, their intentions are pure. They are doing it because they love you with all their heart. Hence, be patient with them. Opening up to them and expressing yourself clearly before them will be useful here.
#4 He is not a good talker
Perhaps the guy lacks conversational skills or gets nervous before you. This will be the case if he is crushing on you. While he might have thought of a hundred things to say, when it comes to it, he looks at you and forgets it all.
While he blabbers before you, look him in the eye. The eye contact might take his breath away. His heart might skip a beat and all that he had managed to speak so far will get erased into nothing. Had you known what the guy feels about you or for you, things should have been far easier to deal with.
Sometimes we just take more time than others to read the context at play. Notice the guy’s eye movement and body language to understand what’s going on in his mind. If he tries to touch you while he is talking, he might be a pervert. If he keeps his safe distance from you while communicating, he is a respectable gentleman.
#5 It's his way of showing affection
Perhaps the guy is fond of you and knows no other language but that of care to express his love for you. He is the product of the patriarchal figure. According to him, a woman understands love through big gestures. He wants to feed you favors. He likes to be the big man in the picture, to play the role of the Godfather who is loved and adored by all.
If he is not your type, if you are a woman in your own right and you don’t like to be helpless or wale before guys, perhaps tell him so. If your tone is rude and high-pitched, he might receive the message with shock but then that is what the situation calls for.
#6 He feels responsible for your happiness
If this guy is your father, stepfather, your ex, or your brother, he might feel that he owes you happiness. Such people can’t stand to see you unhappy and they wonder if there’s something that they have done or not done which has caused the tragedy. Even a release of a sigh from your mouth, the way you gasp, or the frown on your face will make them sad.
Such people are overly sensitive and though they don’t realize it as much, it is they who are the unhappy ones. They ignore their unhappiness by toiling hard to make others smile. These are perhaps the right humans or the wrong humans wanting to make their life right. They know that this is the only way of doing so.
#7 He wants to make conversation
You will see that the guy keeps coming up with many such silly questions which evade you in understanding and purpose. What he is trying to but failing miserably at is to make conversations. Perhaps a little help might ease the process.
The way you can help him out is by taking the lead in making conversation. Give him the right set of questions to ask by promoting it yourself. Play a rapid-fire round to erase the nervousness from between.
You would know if the guy is having a hard time finding out topics to talk about when he asks you about your day regularly. You would realize that these are stereotypical questions that guys hook on to when they have no clue which way they must move. To understand more clearly the thread of such lame questions, check out this article - If A Guy Texts You How Was Your Day.
#8 He likes annoying you
The guy is well aware that he is annoying you. What interests him is how you are coping with his annoyance. He likes to see the limit to which you would go to keep up with his nonsense. It is clear to him that he has a hold on you.
Now he wants to check the power of that hold. He might later use it to read your mind and control you. Try to understand this, when you become the audience to someone, you are valuing them against all odds. At the end of it, they might plan a surprise for you and ask you out.
Think of Sheldon and Amy in this regard. How Sheldon gets uncomfortable when he attempts to express his feelings. It is more so because there are things that he doesn't understand. It is a process of buying time.
You keep dragging the conversation till the moment you are certain of what you want. While this is a nice tactic, you might feel that he is treating you unfairly for he knows all that goes on in your mind and you hardly know anything about him.
Hence, reciprocating questions are important. Girls love to chatter so much that in the process they forget about asking the other person how they are doing.
It might show that you are inconsiderate of others' feelings. The guy is trying to wrap his mind around how the equation will work if he asks you out.
#9 He has perverted motives (sugar daddy)
If the guy is much older than you and keeps flaunting his money around, he might have perverted motives and wants to play the role of sugar daddy in your life in exchange for pleasure.
What he wants is for you to be his puppet and in return, he will keep you happy. This works for some women. They like to be provided for. They find it too much to actually sit at the desk for hours and work hard to earn some pennies.
If you get such vibes from the guy and you are not okay with it, that is, you are not looking for a sugar daddy, block him right away. One characteristic of sugar daddies is that they never force themselves on you.
They want you to seek their favor and to view them in the light of importance. Hence, the guy will never try to harass you. He will make you want to do things for him and to him willingly. It is called willful submission.
#10 He is a gossipmonger
Perhaps the guy is a gossip monger who likes to collect all the nitty grittiest from people's lives and make the information public. They make the most unattractive of the lot.
You will be able to detect whether he is into gossip or not, by not answering his questions. If the next thing that he does is tell you about the problems happening in the life of others, you are to understand that he would have done the same thing with the detail he would have received from your end.
If he stays with you in silence just to give you company, he is genuine in his care and affection. Some of the gossip traits that you can detect in a guy are when he asks you about your love life. It is very unnatural of him to do so. Click on the link to know more - When a Guy Asks About Your Love Life.
#11 He has anxiety or neurodivergent tendencies
The guy might be medically conditioned owing to which he is behaving in this manner. You should not be rude to someone who is showing concern towards you even if you feel that that concern is falsely displayed.
What you should do in this case is to take it slow. Understand his medical history. If possible, accompany him to a psychologist. Try to understand his needs and concerns. You will get to understand many things if you dig into his childhood memories. Get him hypnotized in your words or make him trust you so that he can help you sort things out.
#12 You are getting intimate for the first time
If you were in the middle of a conversation where he is already trying to lead the talk somewhere or perhaps he is getting handsy with you, he might be too nervous. In this case, the idea of asking you if you are okay is basically to assure himself that he is doing okay. This will happen when you are getting intimate with each other for the first time.
It might be that he is getting comfortable with a woman after a long time. Due to this, he is asking you time and again. It also depends on your setting. If the light is dim or off, he cannot read your face. Hence, the only way to know if he is doing it right and if you are comfortable with him is to ask you.
It gets worse if you get intimated in silence. Try to practice being more verbal when you are engaged in a session. However, one thing is clear, he is not trying to dominate you. He truly cares for you and would limit himself to only the extent that makes you comfortable.
If you are in a public area like a club or a garden, you might be very nervous that you might scream in pain or excitement and gather the attention of people. Hence, it is always better to plan things out when you want to do them. Don’t be spontaneous in these matters and take all the precautions needed.
#13 He is scared of you
If you are one of those hot-tempered women, any guy would think twice before asking you out. If you don’t think twice before snapping at a person, someone who even wants to befriend you will maintain a calm voice and ask you how you are holding up.
A good human would know that all that anger pents up from somewhere deep. You might be hurt and you deny to acknowledge the pain. This guy might be an empath. He understands what you feel deep inside. Some people are gifted with telepathic abilities. This guy might be having one and he knows that you are fighting off some strong emotions to keep up with the conviction.
Ultimately, we all like to live in our world of make-believe. You dwell in yours and you have it when people try to shuffle things. Or, you have lived long in your world of make-believe when reality finally struck hard and you realized that all you had been keeping faith in for so long was wrong.
This guy wants to help you because he has been through a similar phase himself. Perhaps let yourself a little loose because this guy is here to stay. He wouldn’t be easily put off. He is as stubborn as you and he believes that he is among the rare ones who are capable of taming you.
#14 He is dumb in romance
If the guy you are dating is a nerd who hadn’t been offered a guidebook that dictates the etiquette of dating a woman, he might keep asking you in plain and simple language if you are happy the way your life is or if you will want something less or more in it.
The guy is aware that he is capable of offering you whatever it might be that you want. He is passionate about you. He thinks of you as a rare person and prizes you as his possession. Hence, he cares for you so much.
Trust me when I say this, there is nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of here. If you are keeping things related to your boyfriend from your friends because their boyfriends don’t check on them the way you do, reset your mentality.
The guy loves you and cares for you the way other guys don’t. These days, people hardly understand the meaning of true romance and love. Hence appreciate what you have received and nourish it with at least an equal amount of love and care if not more.
What should you do when a guy asks you if you are okay?
Tell him if you are okay or not. See for yourself what is the solution that he proposes. Take one step at a time and you might end up getting up with him. How to do it? Read below to find out.
#1 Ask him why he feels you are not
There is nothing better than a confrontation. Ask the guy why he feels that you might not be doing okay. Tell him to spill the beans. Hear him out and decide for yourself what he might have meant by it.
Take your time to process whatever it is that he gives you an answer. Don't rush into exclaiming or claiming things. If he has some misconception, holds on to the moment before trying to clear the doubts. It is important to first know what are the possible sources of such doubts. Are the false impressions been put by you in their mind somehow or is there someone out there spreading rumors?
#2 Ask him what will he do if you weren't
Ask him how he will prove himself to be useful if he found out that you weren't okay. Tell him to reveal his tactics and tools before you. This will tell you how hollow or filled he truly is.
If he truly is full of materials, allow him to turn things right or walk you through the trouble. Even if there isn't anything possibly bothering you, you can narrate to him the story of a friend who can use help. It will bring both of you an opportunity to develop a friendship.
#3 Tell him to not beat about the bush
If you feel that the guy is trying to arrive at a point but having a difficult time understanding how to tell you about it directly, you help him out. Hold his hands, make eye contact, and whisper that you trust him.
Make him believe in you so that he can believe in the purpose too. Ask yourself what you feel for him. Had you found him to be a creep, you wouldn't have minded a word he said to you or about you. The fact that you are reading this article shows that you have some feelings for him. Hence, believe in yourself so that you can make him believe in you.
#4 Ask him if he is doing well
The guy might not be feeling at his best. He might want you to ask him how he is doing. He might be needy. In such cases, you should try to be supportive and help the person. However, this should be done from a distance. He should not get so attached to you that he starts feeling vulnerable. If you can't be a person's strength, don't be their weakness either.
#5 Redirect the topic
If he doesn't know how to talk and you get bored as well, don't hesitate in leading the conversation by redirecting the topic. The new topic should be something that you like. You can discuss your hobbies, your travel diaries, or experiences that have no sad element.
This will make all your conversations happy and easygoing. It will keep things light and won't make it awkward for either of you. Sometimes it's just that we are trying too hard that we knock the deal off unconsciously.
#6 Let him help
Perhaps the guy knows what he is doing. He is trying to help you out of a situation. You may be unaware of the trouble you might be in. It might be that you didn't see it coming but the guy either eavesdropped it or was taken into confidence.
He wants to protect you again; the danger you aren't of is lurking in the background. Perhaps give him the opportunity and let him talk or tell him about the problems and he might set it right.
#7 Say thank you
Whether someone checks in on you out of concern or just as a friendly gesture, it's important to acknowledge their efforts and show gratitude for their kindness. Hence, don't keep yourself from giving the token of thanks as and when needed. After all, it is all about polite words spoken between each other that can heal and perform magic. Your words are your spell.
#8 Be more verbal in expression
If you are sleeping together and you are keeping mum, it is downright ridiculous. The guy is trying to make love to you. You should communicate how you are feeling and encourage him to continue it the way you like.
These things get easy with time. You must therefore take one step at a time. Research shows that having s*x after sexting is more helpful and enjoyable since you are open to each other. If you have exchanged steamy or private pictures with one another, you both will feel more comfortable in your body and under each other’s skin.
Moreover, you can take the opportunity to talk about your preferences in various ways. Do you like to edge things up with foreplay or directly hit the nail with spontaneous actions? You must know what it is that turns either of you on. Why are you attracted to each other and more.
These are things that must stay between both of you.
#9 Be Yourself
When you can see that the guy is trying too hard and he is there chasing you, perhaps seeing his rivals upfront and challenging them too, let him do it. Don’t try to be overly cute, or sexy, or mock him falsely. Nothing will motivate him more than looking at the real you.
When you continue to behave in silence the way you do, looking at him from the corner of your eyes so that he knows you are observing but that is a secret your audience stays unaware about, it is sexy.
You don’t have to be explicit about how you feel or don’t feel about someone. Sometimes just being honest and transparent works. Hence, don’t try to fight your impulse or guard your nature under some sheet. Be blunt and basic. True people will appreciate that. It is their cup of tea and they won’t exchange it for anything else in the world.
#10 Don’t be a puppet in the hands of society
Just because you have friends who call certain vibes weird, doesn’t mean it becomes weird. It might not be the most typical or common thing one does, but that is what makes room for uniqueness, right?
Trust your vibe. When you are attracted to someone and find their vibes friendly, go with the flow. You don’t have to share things with anyone till the time you feel comfortable doing it. You don’t need consent from the world nor is there any need to put things on Instagram and make it a highlight of your life. There is no greater art or skill than staying low-key. A guy who loves to check on you so often will appreciate it.
Don't get annoyed easily. When a person is persistent about something, they are trying to send you a message. You will be able to decode it if you pay attention. In such cases, you need to realize the worst-cases case scenario would be your loss of time. They don't do you any harm, so keep patience and you will be guided to the ultimate result.