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My Girlfriend Doesn't Care About Me [Reasons & Solutions]

If your girlfriend doesn't care about you, she is using you as a prop either to get over someone she has dated in the past or to draw attention from someone she is willing to date in the future. It's better to know a bit about her past and ask her clearly about what she feels for you.A guy sits at his desk in front of a laptop, thinking something deeply

We set on a relationship when we find the other person attractive. But a relationship is nurtured with love and care. Exchange of messages, short reminders, sending photos, expressing one's concern for the others well being makes the bond strong.

However, if, in your case, all the show of love and concern is one-sided, it indicates one-sided love. While your girlfriend might have reasons to be so occupied that you feel she doesn't care for you, this should not happen all the time.

I've discussed the primary reasons for this unnatural behavior and have further pointed out ways in which you can fix this for your relationship and yourself.

Possible reasons why your girlfriend doesn't care about you

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because she cares about someone or something else instead. It's either that she is obsessed with a new book or a series, or there's some other person in her life to whom she is devoted right now.

However, allowing her some time might fix this right. I've shared all the possible reasons for this unreasonable behavior of your girlfriend below. Keep reading to know more!

#1 She doesn't love you 

Your girlfriend doesn't care much about how you feel or how your day went because she isn't that deeply in love with you. 

It takes correct timing and the right working of stars to make two persons fall in love with the same intensity at the same time.

Most of the time, in love, the reciprocation is not consistent. You always feel that you are investing yourself more while your partner has taken you for granted. 

In this case, too, you might be the one always texting your girlfriend first and asking her about her day while she stays aloof and replies as per her convenience. It means that she doesn't love you.

She likes you and takes it slow to see how far it goes. If you feel for her, be patient with her. If you feel you came into this relationship hastily, take some time to understand your feelings better.

#2 She is too self-centric 

Your girlfriend might be too self-centered and self-centric to show her concern for you. This might be due to her past experiences where her show of care was either ridiculed or taken for granted.

However, this doesn't imply that she doesn't love you. It only suggests that she will need some time to love you more than she loves herself. 

Some people have been such loners in life that they like to look after themselves. When anyone else attempts to take charge and care for them, it might make them uncomfortable.

However, they will appreciate it in the long run and shall learn to return it all the same. Try to understand her past. We all have one that has come into three making of our present.

#3 She is not over her ex 

Your girlfriend is not as dedicated to you as you would have wanted her to be because she's not over-ex. It might be that she began dating you to divert herself and her thoughts from her ex. She might have been in a serious and long-term relationship for a while before she started to move on to someone else. 

If you guys came across each other via a dating app, there isn't much that you can do about it but wait for her to open up and involve you in her inner world.

However, if someone mutual sets you up, you can approach them to know more about her past and take your steps accordingly.

#4 She wants to keep it casual 

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because she doesn't want to care about you. She is more willing to keep the relationship casual. 

You meet one another and have a great time together and forget all about it until you decide to meet again. 

Well, believe it or not, this is how people like to keep it these days. The dating scene is miserable, and people don't like to expose their vulnerable side to you.

Once you have spent a long time together, she might get more comfortable and start relating to you with more love.

#5 She is mad at you 

Your girlfriend might not show that she cares for you because she is mad at you. If you have noticed this change in her behavior recently, you should ask her about it. 

Start your conversation with an endearing term, "Darling, it seems that something has been bothering you lately. Would you like to share?"

This will allow her to talk and tell you whatever has been going on in her mind.

However, if she has always been like this, it means that she doesn't care for you or love you enough.

This can also be because you haven't yet had any special moment with her, which would make the two of you inseparable. That moment has to be something emotional, such as a goal that you both have been working for or a loss that has made a major difference in both of your lives.

#6 She wants to call it off 

Women have this mode of behavior that when she loves someone, they will get fixated with that person. On the other hand, when she loses interest in a person, she will stop communicating or checking on them.

This might be the case with you. She has stopped caring or never essentially cared enough for you because she wants to call it off.

There can be multiple reasons for this. It might be that she lost her interest in you or is not getting from the relationship what she had hoped for. You will either have to wait until she tells you straight or ask her directly if you strongly feel this might be the case.

#7 You don't care for her 

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because you don't care for her, or even if you do, you don't show it to her.

It's like when you love a person, but you could never make it to utter the magical words to them.

We live in a world where expressions are more appreciated than efforts. You cook lunch for them but forget to remind them to have it, and it will go unappreciated. It is in human nature to take things for granted. 

#8 She is using you 

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because she is using you. Are you always available when she needs you? Is she always available when you need her? How do the two of you make decisions, is it mutual, or it's always one of you who gets to make the call? Answers to such questions will help you estimate if she exploits you for her needs or seriously into you.

While making conversations, notice her tone. If she is always melancholic and puts herself in a sorry state, she is not the lady for you.

However, if she is always jolly and likes to keep worries away, you will enjoy being with her. The choice is yours to make.

#9 She is mean 

If your girlfriend doesn't care about you, it might be because she has never cared about anyone besides herself and her needs. It is in her nature to be mean. She might have her reasons for that. Life might have been harsh with her. 

You must allow her to love you right by stating your expectations. She might be a novice at dating. If you show her the right path and are willing to bridge the gap, you are good to go along. If not, you might want to have a more sympathetic person in your life.

#10 You don't pamper her 

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because you don't pamper her enough.

Pampering is caring.

The basic elements that go into it are asking her about her day, giving her chocolates or flowers whenever you meet, kissing her on the forehead. These gestures show that you care.

Start overwhelming her with your love, and she will do the same.

#11 She is busy 

You might feel that your girlfriend is neglected towards you. Whereas in reality, she is busy with her work and cannot take out time to express her love and care for you.

Asking her about her routine shall ease the process for you. Dropping a text such as, "Are you keeping busy? May I give you a lift back home?" It will be appreciated, but she will not mind sharing her whereabouts with you. In this way, you will be indirect with your needs, and she will be able to give you some time even when she keeps busy.

#12 She is ill 

When did you check up last on your girlfriend? It might be that she is not keeping well. How much do you know about her health and her cycle?

Women are most prone to the thyroid, diabetes, and PCOS. Knowing your girlfriend's cycle and immunity system will help you know her health. When you take an interest in her health, she will automatically take an interest in yours.

Visiting a doctor together will strengthen your bond.

#13 She is needed somewhere else 

She is not paying much attention to your needs or cannot take your care because all her attention is needed somewhere else.

It might be that her grandmother is keeping sick and she is so exhausted looking after her that when she gets some free time, she wants to be dreamy and at leisure rather than worrying about anyone's health.

#14 She is the modern woman 

Your girlfriend is a modern woman who doesn't care for old-school values and norms. She feels that we are all independent creatures and capable of looking after well being.

She is there with you to enjoy your company rather than to be loaded with the task of looking after you. After all, she is your girlfriend, not your mother.

#15 You're not her priority 

Your girlfriend doesn't care about you because you don't top her priority list. It can be that she has found someone you and all her interest is absorbed towards that person.

You might want to check who she chats with or spend time talking to most. She might be in a transition period where she takes some time before calling it off.

What to do when your girlfriend doesn't care for you? 

If your girlfriend doesn't care about you, show her that it bothers you. You express your expectations before your girlfriend shall make it easy for you in the long run.

Remember, your girlfriend is supposed to be your soulmate. The first thing you are supposed to do is share your feelings with her. Keep reading to find out how to do that and make it a love story you desire.

#1 Spend time with her 

Spending more time with your girlfriend will bring you closer. You will start appreciating each other's company. This, in turn, will make you aware of each other's flaws. We are a collection of flaws. What you need to learn by spending time together is how to be more flawless together. 

#2 Love her more 

If your girlfriend doesn't care about you, it is perhaps because you don't love her enough. Love takes time to build a home in one's heart. 

You need to take that time and show her that you mean it. Once she begins to associate her whole soul with you, there's no withdrawing. She will love you with all her might. 

#3 Try to know her friends 

Knowing your girlfriend's friends will help you know more about her temperament, and you will be able to understand the reasons behind her behavior. You will also get to notice if she treats you the way she treats them or is she on guard around you.

If she is on guard, it suggests that she hasn't begun to trust you completely. Hold her hands when you are together, look her in the eyes, declare your love for reassurance, offer your shoulder for her headrest. These small gestures will take you a long way in understanding each other.

#4 Talk to her 

Communicate your needs and desires to your girlfriend. You can put down all your guise before her.

In a relationship, you must know one another inside out. When you expose your vulnerable side to her, she will be encouraged to do the same.

This will pull you both closer and help you in sticking together. She will automatically learn to care to keep you from things that make you feel low or vulnerable.

#5 Give her a surprise 

Planning a surprise for your girlfriend shouldn't be something occasional. When you are in love with a person, you tend to show them that at every opportunity you get. 

Surprising your girlfriend on a weekday with her favorite cake and a bottle of champagne to celebrate your relationship shall deepen her feelings for you.

If she is not used to such behavior, she will feel special and overwhelmed. She will put in efforts to make it grander and more thoughtful for you.

#6 Make your relationship official 

Making your relationship official will make it clear to your girlfriend that you want her to stay. It is a way to express that it is not another fling, and you want it to be it!

She will also take a pause and try to understand her feelings better. The response you get once you have made it official shall be the gateway to her true emotions.

You would know if she loves you enough to stay by your side for the long term. Once she commits herself to you, the caring element won't be kept far away.

#7 Give her time 

If your relationship is young, allow some time for your girlfriend before beginning to judge her. Love is not a discounted emotion, and it doesn't happen overnight.

Once it begins to sink within her that she is sailing the ship with you and you got to look after each other, she will take no time adapting the role and might go beyond your expectations. Don't be too hasty in making your call.

#8 Treat her the way she treats you 

If your girlfriend has never cared about you whereas you have always cared for her, it's time to treat her the way she treats you. If you stop caring for her suddenly, she senses something has changed. 

As a result, either she would stop taking you for granted and work on her conduct, or she would give up on the relationship if she were never serious. Either way, you would know what you mean to her, and you will get the right direction.

#9 Take her on a date 

Taking your girlfriend out on a date and spending some relaxing time with her will help you come closer to each other.

While you're dancing and having your time, you can take out a moment to politely express your concern to her.

This will not come out as something very serious, and you would get an idea as to why she behaves the way she does. Is it true that she doesn't care for you, or is she poor when it comes to making a show of it?

#10 Plan a staycation 

Planning a staycation with your girlfriend will help to spend unhindered hours together.

In this period, you will not only feel love for one another, but it will be a mixed concoction of emotions.

You shall know more about each other's preferences, and you will also learn how to express your viewpoint by keeping it in alignment with the other person.

Summing up 

If you feel that your girlfriend doesn't care for you, allow her to taste her own medicine. When you begin to take her for granted or pretend to do so, she will sense something is different.

At that moment, you must draw back from the past and make her understand that it disappoints you when she treats you that way. If she loves you, she will begin to mend her ways at that very instant.

Suprity Acharyya


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