Ghosted but Not Blocked? I Have Decoded the Reasons!Maybe your partner was hoping that you'd assume things were over and move on by ghosting you. If they've never been good at confrontation or breaking up with people, this could be their solution. If you take the hint, they're hoping that they don't have to deal with the messiness of having a breakup conversation.
Your partner isn't talking to you, they aren't responding to your texts, but they also haven't blocked you on social media or asked to end the relationship outright.
What are they doing?
Why are they doing it?
Let's face it: we've all been ghosted. And even if we haven't, we know what it's like to be left hanging with no explanation. It's a feeling that leaves us wondering what went wrong or why the relationship ended abruptly.
If this sounds familiar to you, I want to give you a high five for being brave enough to read this blog post. Because that means you've decided to take back your life from these ghosts who refuse to leave you alone—and that's an incredibly brave first step!
Here are 11 reasons why your partner might be "ghosted" you but not blocking
It's one of the hardest parts of dating: when you get ghosted. But those who have been ghosted but not blocked know it's a whole new pain level.
Why would someone not block you on all forms of social media but leave your text messages unanswered? It hurts, but there are some good reasons why your partner might be ghosting you without blocking you.
#1 They want to keep tabs on you
Imagine if you could keep tabs on your ex without actually talking to them? Sounds like a dream, right? Well, it might be happening to you.
If it's been a while since the two of you have spoken or hung out, and you see that they're still following you on social media, there's a good chance they're keeping an eye on what you're up to.
Many people don't want to cut the cord completely until they've found someone else. Why? Because they might want to get back together with you down the line—and they know they can't exactly do that if they've blocked your number or unfollowed you on Instagram.
So when your ex is "ghosting" you but not blocking you, don't be surprised if you hear from them again—in a few weeks, months, or even years.
Pro Tip: Do not engage with this person on social media. If they are stalking you online, keep your profile private, so only your friends can see it. You don't need this extra stress in your life!
#2 They're too scared to break up with you
It's painful when you're dating someone, and they ghost you.
But what's twice as painful? Being ghosted by someone who doesn't have the courage to break up with you.
Our best guess is that your partner is ghosting you because they're scared to break up with you, and they're hoping that if they avoid all communication with you, they'll be able to fade away without having to do the actual deed.
When someone ghosts you and doesn't block you, they usually know this is the end of the relationship, but they're too scared to break up with you in person or over the phone (or text). Instead of being straight with you about how they feel, they choose to avoid talking to you at all.
Pro Tip: It's important to realize that if someone is ghosting you, they don't deserve to have any power or control over your life. The best thing to do is to block them yourself—even if it hurts.
In the meantime? Get yourself some flowers and treat yourself!
#3 They don't want to deal with confrontation
When you've been ghosted, the lack of closure can be annoying. And when the person who "ghosted" you doesn't block you, it's a whole other level of confusion.
Why would they do this? Why would they let you dangle like this?
The answer is simple: They don't want to deal with the confrontation.
Blocking you would mean that they'd have to clarify that the relationship has ended, and that's not something they're comfortable with.
It's awkward, upsetting, and challenging to admit that a dating relationship has ended openly. It's easier for them to avoid talking about it by not blocking you on social media or texting platforms.
Your partner doesn't want to confront you or deal with the emotions around ending things on good terms (or bad terms), so they've decided to stop talking to you altogether. It's a cowardly move, but it's not uncommon—so many people find it easier to avoid uncomfortable situations than deal with them head-on.
Pro Tip: If talking doesn't feel right for you, the healthiest thing for you would be to start by giving yourself a bit of space from your ex and the situation itself. Give yourself time away from them (and their social media) to start thinking about what's best for yourself.
#4 They don't want to hurt your feelings
Ghosted, but not blocked: A sign your partner is scared of hurting your feelings.
Even if they know it's the best thing for both of you, ending a relationship can still be painful—and we all have our ways of dealing with that pain. Some people avoid talking about it or just straight-up ghosts, while others get angry and lash out.
But if you've been ghosted by someone who's caring and empathetic, the answer might be much simpler: They're just scared of hurting your feelings.
When you care about someone, helping them through a breakup can feel like a heavy burden, especially if you're the one who ended things.
Pro Tip: The best thing to do is talk about it. It's awkward, but let them know you feel like you've been ghosted and ask if everything is okay. They'll probably feel relieved that you spoke up and want to talk about it.
#5 They're trying to avoid taking responsibility for the breakup
Though, I think you know why.
Let's call it what it is: they're trying to avoid taking responsibility for the breakup. They know how much the two of you meant to each other and don't want to face the music.
They want to move on without dealing with your feelings or theirs—which is selfish and cowardly at best and bad-person-ness at worst.
You might be wondering why they'd do that instead of just dealing with the awkwardness of a breakup. And the answer is probably because they don't have the emotional maturity or strength to do it right now or maybe ever.
They might be afraid that if they acknowledge what happened between you two, all their pain and sadness will come bursting out and swallow them whole.
Pro Tip: This isn't the end of your story: when someone ghosts you, all it means is that you've got a chance to find someone who will treat you right and who won't run away from the problems in your relationship. You deserve the best!
#6 They're just not that into you
Look, you're a great person. You've got so much going for you, and anyone would be lucky to have you in their life.
But the thing is, they're just not that into you. And they're finding it hard to let you know that directly. So they've chosen to ghost you but not block you.
It's a cowardly tactic, and it's one that I find confusing—shouldn't they have blocked you? That way, there wouldn't be any doubt about what's happening here. But instead, they've left the door open just enough for you to keep wondering.
Listen, this person has decided to ghost you—they've made it clear they have no interest in you or your feelings by not acknowledging your existence anymore.
They've also made it clear they are unwilling to let you move on by keeping you stuck in limbo with their continued presence in your life, and that's where I think it crosses a line.
This is a person who is incredibly selfish and inconsiderate of your feelings. They don't deserve another second of your time or attention, and the only thing left for them to do is apologize for their behavior. If they can't understand why what they are doing is so wrong, maybe they aren't ready for a relationship.
Pro Tip: So, what should you do moving forward? The best thing is probably to block them and move on with your life.
#7 They're not ready to commit
No matter how much we love someone, sometimes we aren't in the right place to be in a relationship. Sometimes we aren't ready for what we want a partner to give us. Sometimes we have other things going on in our lives that take up all of our availability. And sometimes, we don't feel like we have the tools to say "no" to something without hurting someone's feelings.
Ghosting is an easy solution for people who feel helpless about saying no without hurting someone else's feelings or getting into an uncomfortable conversation. It's easier than saying "no."
But let me tell you: you're worth so much more than someone who can't sit down and have a tough conversation with you. You are worth more than someone who would rather disappear from your life than face up to their fears and barriers.
#8 They're confused and don't know what they want
Your partner hasn't ghosted you because of anything you've done wrong or because they're a bad person—they've ghosted you because they're confused about what they want from life and their romantic relationship with you. This confusion has caused them to retreat into themselves and avoid further contact with you.
And while it hurts, it's better that they didn't stay around while trying to figure out what they wanted.
#9 They need a little space
The truth is, sometimes your partner needs a little space. That doesn't mean they don't love you—it just means that maybe they need some time to themselves. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with your relationship. But it does mean that maybe you shouldn't be around them right now.
If you think your partner may be ghosting but not blocking you, it might be time to give them their space and work on yourself and your own life for a while without planning every single second around them.
It's okay to give them space to figure out those things; it probably has nothing to do with you.
Pro Tip: If you want to understand what's going on in their head, ask them—but don't pressure them into anything or make them feel obligated to answer a question they're not ready for yet.
#10 They are not good at communicating
It's important to remember that different people communicate differently, and it's okay if someone isn't good at communicating their feelings about something as sensitive as a relationship that has ended.
Being ghosted by your partner is a terrible feeling. You might even be doubting your worth, wondering what you did wrong or if there was anything you could have done to stop it.
But try to remember that just because someone ghosts you doesn't mean you've done anything wrong. The fact that this person hasn't directly communicated with you about the situation does not reflect on you or your worth—it reflects on them and their inability to be mature enough to have an honest conversation with you.
If they cannot communicate honestly and openly, maybe they aren't ready for a relationship.
Don't beat yourself up over this—focus on what makes YOU great, and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise!
#11 You did something hurtful
You did something that hurt them, and they are too upset or hurt right now to talk with you about it.
I know what it's like to be ghosted. And I also know that sometimes, being ghosted is the best thing your partner can do for you. They are too hurt, upset, or vulnerable to engage with you right now without lashing out or saying something they'll regret.
You must take responsibility for your part in this, even if you feel like your partner is overreacting and blowing things out of proportion.
Try sending a message like this: "I know that there's no real way to make this better, but if you feel like talking with me about what happened or how you're feeling, please let me know. You don't have to do anything right now, but please know that I'll be here with open ears if and when you are ready to talk with me about this."
It's so easy to get lost in pain, to focus on all of the questions that are now swirling around your head: What did I do wrong? Is it something about me? Will I ever find love again?
So instead of focusing on what happened—or worse, trying to contact them a million times over in a fit of what-ifs—why not try looking at this as an opportunity for personal growth?
Here are some ways to move on
Ghosting is a bad habit to get into because it hurts people. And while it's not your fault when someone ghosts you, it can still hurt to be on the receiving end of that—especially if you're already not feeling your best. So what can you do?
- First, take some time to grieve the loss of the relationship. You don't have to put on a brave face for anyone else. Take as long as you need to process what happened and how you're feeling about it.
And no matter what happens, remember that you are worthy of love and affection, and you will find someone else who makes you feel appreciated and valued.
If this is the first time your partner has ghosted you, I suggest giving them some space for a week or two to sort through things independently.
But if this has happened before and it's causing problems in your relationship, then it's time to sit down with them and have an honest conversation about what's going on.
If it turns out they have no desire to change their behavior at all, then it might be best for both of you to leave permanently instead of continuing this toxic cycle over again every few months like clockwork (which doesn't sound very healthy).
- Reach out to your support system—your friends and family are always there for you when you need them most! Try calling one up or going over to their house if possible.
- Have fun with your hobbies! Get lost in a good book or binge-watch some TV shows while eating ice cream (if possible). Whatever makes life more bearable right now will help immensely.
All of these reasons and more may be why your partner ghosted you but not blocked you at the same time. And while it may be hard to hear, it's better to know now than later—after you've become fully invested in a relationship that wasn't meant to happen.
As painful as this might be, there are some things you can do to make sure that you get back out there and make your next relationship even better than the last one.