Boyfriend Gets Mad When I Make Mistakes [SOLVED]
If your boyfriend gets mad with you for failing at something you're trying to do, then he is most likely a serious perfectionist. They're extremely demanding of themselves and, as a result, this can come off as super-picky or judgmental toward others.Making mistakes is part of life. We're bound to make errors as human beings and even more if we have a job or other responsibilities. We are bound to make mistakes in our relationships too.
I mean, come on, we are not perfect beings. Of course, we're going to make mistakes from time to time, and maybe even often.
It can be frustrating when your relationship is one big cry-fest. You know that guy loves you, but sometimes he just needs to let off a little steam and get some of that built-up negativity out there.
It hurts like when you think of how much love and effort you've put into your relationship — only to have him freak out on you because he thinks you don't look nice enough or you forgot something as small as where your mom is staying for the holidays.
Have you ever tried to reach out for help when your boyfriend gets serious about something and ends up becoming an overbearing control rod, telling you what you should do at every turn?
Instead of supporting you and allowing you to find your own way, he yells at you every time you fail or refuse to listen to him.
Here are 10 reasons why your boyfriend gets mad when you make mistakes
If you were planning the perfect evening with your man, the last thing you'd want to add to that is your worrying about what he might be thinking when you make a mistake.
Everyone makes mistakes, and we all are human, after all. But how do men react? You may just want to know why your boyfriend gets mad when you make mistakes and have an occasional slip of the tongue.
#1 Zero tolerance level
You may feel that you're an inherently 'good' person, but sometimes the smallest of mistakes can set a person off.
If your boyfriend gets so angry with you just for making little mistakes, it's usually because he has a zero-tolerance level. He thinks everything should be according to his plans and standards; he doesn't want to hear anything against what he wants.
A person with high tolerance level lets his counterpart know that he is willing to overlook the flaws, but someone with low tolerance levels wants to see everything as perfect as possible.
#2 The big fat male ego
You have a boyfriend. He loves you. He's supposed to take care of you and make you feel better when you're sad and upset about some things, right?
But you constantly feel bad when you make a little mistake because your boyfriend gets so angry and yells at you as if your mistake was the end of the world. He likely suffers from Big Fat Male Ego.
The Ego always makes men need to feel superior over any woman they are with. And that shouldn't be tolerated by women. We should stand our ground.
#3 He is a perfectionist
Imagine never being able to make a mistake; horrible, isn't it? There is nothing worse than knowing you can't learn because you're terrified of making mistakes and hurting your boyfriend's feelings.
This is exactly what I suffered from, and let me tell you, it's not worth it. Unfortunately, the effects of having to live up to someone else's idealistic expectations of perfection cost me several years of my life.
Some people might call it a level of obsessiveness or even an over-achievement drive, but if it makes your boyfriend mad when you make mistakes and hinder your ability to learn something or do something well, this is the classic example of perfectionism in a relationship.
Perfectionists get angry when they see that you failed at something because they expect you to succeed.
Nobody's perfect, so making mistakes is unavoidable. However, if your boyfriend gets mad at you because of your failing attempts or mishaps, he is probably not someone you should be with.
#4 He is a narcissist
What is it that makes your boyfriend mad at you?
When you fail at something, do you feel embarrassed or discouraged?
If so, having a boyfriend who gets mad at you for making mistakes is a sign that he might be narcissistic. This can affect your relationship and make it more difficult for you to live with someone with an extreme form of a narcissistic personality.
A narcissist sees through your mistakes and will hold them against you. A narcissist won't know or care about YOUR story.
If you've dated a narcissist for any length of time, you're familiar with the narcissist that finds endless ways to blame, shame, and attack you for things that are seemingly beyond your control.
Life can be tough, and sometimes things just "don't go your way." We understand it's hard to face failure, and if you're already providing for yourself in any way, then the last thing you want to see is one more thing failing when you're trying to do.
This is why we need to understand which people display a pattern of narcissism that may prevent us from succeeding in certain aspects of life we are trying to accomplish.
#5 May have parental wound
Mothers and fathers play a vital role in child development. The way a child is raised greatly affects the kind of person they can become.
This is why if your boyfriend gets mad at you for failing at something you're trying to do, then he most likely has a parental wound.
Perhaps he failed at something that his parents told him was very important that had high expectations, but he couldn't reach them.
A boyfriend getting upset with you for making mistakes is common in emotionally unavailable relationships. When the man has some childhood wounds triggered by your errors, it overwhelms his ability to be there for you.
This happens because he was often criticized, punished, and even humiliated by his parents or caregivers as a child. He had to deal with the pressure of being perfect for him to feel accepted and loved.
And so now, if something goes wrong, something he considers not the best thing ever — he gets upset about it. This can lead to emotional outbursts and, in some cases, physical abuse.
#6 Abusive by nature
If your boyfriend gets mad with you for failing at something you're trying to do, he is most likely abusive by nature.
At first, we all make mistakes, but if a man takes his anger out on you for trying something new, he is not supportive of you.
He probably continues to harass you throughout, yelling at you and using foul language. Manipulative people tend to use emotions against their victims.
There are lots and different kinds of reasons behind why some people lose their temper and become abusive and emotional, but the one common trait is that they all have issues with self-control and the inability to cope with their emotions properly.
Healthy individuals won't take failure or mistakes out of your hands and encourage you to try again.
#7 Facing crisis in life
I am sure you have had the funny experience of making a tiny mistake but suddenly realizing that your angry boyfriend is glaring at you.
Often, a man gets angry at women when he faces problems in life. If your boyfriend gets mad at you for making mistakes, then he is really facing a crisis in his life. He could be facing this turmoil on the personal level or the professional level.
But it is probably true that he is facing some sort of dilemma and striving to find an answer to it on one level or the other.
The short-term effect may be that you're frustrated, hurt, and resentful, but don't get too upset about it. Instead of getting mad at him for his reaction to your words and mistakes, look at what might be causing his anger.
#8 Your relationship is not fulfilling
If your boyfriend gets mad at you for making mistakes, he is not having a fulfilling relationship with you. Sure, everybody has their explosions from time to time, but there are signs that this kind of behavior could mean something more serious.
It might be a sign that your relationship is not as healthy as you would like it to be. Maybe he thinks you're incapable of doing even the simplest task, and that's also difficult for an individual to get used to.
Relationship outlets are not built on negativity and nitpicking. If your boyfriend is struggling to accept you, he might actually be struggling with accepting himself.
Being in a relationship can be wonderful. But it doesn't mean you have to put up with your boyfriend for running their mouth to you about your mistakes. A man must respect the woman and not nag or draw them down because they cannot accept that everyone makes mistakes.
#9 You're repeating the same mistakes
Your boyfriend has warned you before that this is unacceptable! He told you not to fail at paying attention while driving but did you listen? No! He has a good reason for being mad at you - when you make mistakes constantly, it could put him in danger.
If your boyfriend gets mad with you for failing at something you're trying to do, you are most likely repeating the same mistakes repeatedly, which is pissing him off.
If you are repeating the same mistakes over and over, there's no way he'd not react.
You promised him not to do that again, but it would appear that this is becoming a habit of yours. Why would he trust you anymore?
Your boyfriend gets mad at you no matter what, especially if he watched you repeat the same mistakes over and over again. You are not bothered to change as you think he will just let it go eventually.
This doesn't seem right, as no one can tolerate this in a relationship. If this continues, he may break up with you when he gets tired of it.
If this sounds like your current relationship, don't worry because there are steps to take to save it.
#10 He has lost interest in you
If your boyfriend gets mad even at your smallest mistake, he most likely has lost interest in you. He is annoyed with you and tired of your behavior.
The first thing to do when your boyfriend loses his patience is ask yourself if the mistakes of his partner annoy him or it's just an excuse to start a conflict.
Relationships are about respect, trust, and understanding. Your partner should not blame everything on you and therefore make you feel like a bad person. If your boyfriend reacts badly to little mistakes, it could be an early warning sign that he is cheating on you or that he has just come to hate you.
What should you do when your boyfriend gets made at your mistakes?
Knowing how to deal with it is important when you feel attacked by the one you love. I share your pain and five simple ways to help him stop being so cranky.
#1 Understand the situation
The best thing that you could do is recognize your own part in it, the mistakes you committed and try to understand that whatever you did must have hurt him. Is there a way for you to correct your mistake if it is? If yes, then go ahead and do it with justification.
#2 Lend him an ear
So if you are in a relationship where your boyfriend gets mad when you make mistakes, remember to let them vent out everything and give your version of the story. That might help things get a little better!
This is the most important yet hardest step that you should take. If you rush and don't listen to what your boyfriend has to say during this phase, it will result in a catastrophic situation.
#3 Give him some time
If you really love this guy and have decided that your relationship is worth fighting for, then take a step back and give him some time alone to cool off.
You don't want to approach him when he is angry or yell back at him. This will make both of you feel worse and cause you to lose even more respect for each other.
When he gets mad at you, don't argue. It would help if you remembered that your boyfriend needs some time to cool off as long as you don't say anything wrong to set him off. Learn how to manage real-life situations together so that you can respond to them properly in the future.
#4 Acknowledge his emotion and offer help
When you make mistakes, your boyfriend gets mad at you. He's a person who wants to be in control of his own life. When a man becomes angry, and it's aimed at you, step back, acknowledge to yourself that he's feeling some intense emotions over your mistake, and think about how you can help.
#5 Communicate confidently
One of the most important parts of a relationship is communication. And to communicate with each other effectively, we have to acknowledge they are having a certain feeling while being confident that they aren't always right (and vice versa). It's not going to be easy. But by doing these few simple things, you could see the relationship turn out better than it ever did before.
#6 Take a break
Have you ever had a boyfriend that gets mad at you for making a mistake?
It's really hard to deal with your boyfriend like this. It hurts when someone we care about is treating us in a not nice way because of our mistakes. Sometimes the people we love can be so cruel and hurt us in ways we never thought they could.
If they don't care at all about what they are saying, then stop caring about them and their opinion of you.
There is one thing you should know though if they are telling you mean things because they are getting mad at you, then there might be a problem with them liking/loving you.
If you’re trying to start something or learn something new and your boyfriend gets mad with you for failing at something you're trying to do, then will suggest you take a break from your boyfriend.
#7 Phew!!! It is time to part your ways
There are times when you make a mistake, but it does not mean that you should suffer for it. If your boyfriend gets mad at you for your mistakes, then I will suggest you part your ways with your boyfriend.
You know you cannot bear any kind of violence and you do not deserve it as well.
Find some other activities which will help you to divert your mind and make you concentrate on your aims of life. Very soon you will feel that you are more confident and able to face the world in a very smart way.
Attract him with your charm, intelligence, and humor and make him realize how many valuable things he is losing by behaving so badly with you.
I have tried my best to give the best possible solution to your problem and have cited examples wherever necessary. I hope this guide has helped you deal with the situation in your relationship.