Boyfriend Gets Mad When I Ask Him Questions [Reasons and Solutions]If he gets mad at the questions you pose, it shows his insensitivity and lack of trust. He might think you are accusing him of cheating. This might be due to his previous relationships. Allow him some time to trust you first.
Relationships have their ups and downs. It takes a long while after getting committed to open up to the partner completely. To share things candidly requires the input of effort from both sides.
If your guy avoids your question or changes the topic every time you pose one, it might be because he hasn't opened up with you. However, worry not. After studying the reasons for this lack of proper communication, we will figure out how this can be fixed.
Possible reasons why your boyfriend gets mad at your simple questions
Your questions remind him of his past. It triggers him, and there's a flashback of all the moments he would prefer not to live again. However, if the questions are as simple as his day has been, he is annoyed because he is looking for something more than the question answers sessions. Keep reading to know more!
#1 You ask too many questions
If you have had the reputation of a question box all your life, you might want to work on that now. Asking questions all the time can be annoying. If your questions are simple, you might learn the answer naturally through observation.
Listening is a great skill and is never condescending. It doesn't make the other person annoyed. Work on your listening skills. Try to find answers without posing questions through natural conversations.
#2 He finds you nagging
If you are one of those always nagging girlfriends, your boyfriend might appreciate some space. Please don't create an overwhelming effect, don't try too hard or push it too much.
Practice the skill of asking the questions to yourself first. See if you have the answer to it or would it make you uncomfortable.
#3 Your questions are meaningless to him
Your boyfriend doesn't understand the purpose of your questions. Your questions hold no significance in the practical world. They are too much future or past-oriented. He is more interested in living the present moment. It might be due to this that he gets mad at you.
You can ask him about it in a general way. If there is something too peculiar about it, he might not mind sharing.
#4 He likes to ask questions
A good speaker is not a good listener. Similarly, an interviewer might not prove to be a good interviewee.
Your boyfriend is more used to sitting on the other side of the table. Hence it becomes pestering for him when he is put in the limelight.
#5 He feels you don't trust him
It might be that when you ask him questions, he feels as if you don't trust him. This might be very disheartening. Your partner should always feel that you love and trust him without unwavering faith.
Try to understand his concern. It's okay if some of your questions remain unanswered. Know your priorities. Care more for emotions and feelings.
#6 He is not serious about you
Your boyfriend might not have completely immersed his interest and attention into you. It takes time. And trust me, the slower it goes, the stronger it becomes.
However, if at any moment you feel that he is disrespecting you or taking you for granted, confront him. Discipline is important to maintain relationships. Don't spoil him by being too lenient. Behavior must be regularized accordingly.
#7 He wants to keep it conditional and limited
Your boyfriend might want to play by his rulebook. He might want to condition the amount of love, devotion, and dedication that he endows upon you.
If you feel that he is conditioning himself or your relationship and is limited in the contribution, you might not want to invest all your thought and energy at this time.
Let your relationship develop further, and hopefully, if it lasts as planned, you will get your turn to get your answers.
#8 You never answer his questions
If you don't answer your boyfriend's questions, he might naturally get annoyed when you expect him to answer yours. Or, if he never asks you questions, he expects the same out of you. These are generally early signs that the guy doesn't want to take the relationship long.
The next time you ask him questions, ask serious ones instead of simple ones. First, give him a briefing on the purpose of your questions. This will give him a heads up, and he would know better not to ignore these questions, or it might make you mad this time.
#9 You're too inquisitive
You are like a child who asks questions without giving them a second thought. But children are not always pleasing, remember? You might be his baby, and he might love you a lot, but at times the behavior gets overwhelming, and all that the heart wants is some time away from the sweetheart. There's nothing wrong with it.
It's alright to take some me-time and time off when it gets overwhelming. However, that doesn't allow one to be rude or give unfair treatment. You can suggest that if he needs some time off or some distance, you would be happy to provide it.
#10 You're not romantic
If you are very monotonous as a girlfriend, that is, if you don't make interesting or exciting conversations or don't exchange photographs via text, or don't share something intimate with your boyfriend, it can be annoying for your guy.
You need to feed him, love, before you ask for justifications. If there's a lack on that note, it will be very off-putting. Balance the doses of being romantic and being serious with your guy. He will appreciate it.
#11 You're bossy
If you are a bossy and dominating girlfriend, it might suddenly bother your boyfriend. He might not have realized it in the initial phase or might not have minded it, but now he is always thinking about it, which might have led to a change in his behavior.
Consider trying role reversal for a while. Give him the upper hand. Please take note of the way he changes his behavior. Notice things like, does he treat you right? Does he appreciate your efforts? These are the questions that you should be focusing on.
#12 He likes to dominate you
Getting mad at you for unnecessary reasons is his way of taking you under his control. He likes to dominate you. Believe me, when I say this, guys love to take control and dictate their terms.
However, if you strongly like him and want those to work, try to come to an understanding.
Talk it out. It should take the form of a discussion. Don't engage into lecturing or one-sided conversations. It will do neither of you any good. Make your gesture, your questions, and your words as meaningful as possible.
#13 He is busy
He might get annoyed by your questions because he is busy doing something, or he might be deeply absorbed in his thoughts when you come up with your questions. Try to understand if your boyfriend is mentally sharing that space with you before asking him a question.
If he is physically present but mentally absorbed and distracted, he might not behave the way you would want him. It's better to understand if he is worried about something or not.
When you ask him questions, let the first one be about how he is feeling at that moment. If he offers a satisfactory reply, it would mean that he is in a good mood. If not, it suggests that he is trying to hide his concern.
#14 He is impatient
Your boyfriend is not mad at you. He is impatient by nature. When one partner is impatient, the other has to be highly patient while working on leveling up the patience of the other partner.
You will have to try something on a similar note. Remember, it's not his fault. He might be a short-tempered person.
The reason for this could range from one to many. Find out it's the root cause and help him out. At moments like this, we need more love from our close ones.
#15 He is a snob
If your partner is a snob and doesn't believe in communicating his thoughts or feels that you would never understand it, it's going to take a while to adjust with him.
A snob loves his comfort zone and does all that it takes not to shed their old skin. However, if you got to work on this together, you will have to make him realize that you are his new comfort zone, and he can let go of his insecurities.
#16 He is actually cheating on you
If you ask him questions such as who he was talking to or why his phone was busy, or about where he spent his day and that makes him mad at you, I suggest you to be careful. These are natural behaviors of guys when they are cheating on you. They try to avoid answering any questions in detail and lack a definite answer or proper name for your question.
In such cases, checking his phone history and talking to his friends or, in simple ways, trying to spy on him for a day or two to catch him red-handed can be helpful if you have invested yourself too much with him. If not, I would suggest, let him be. If your love isn't enough for him, there's no reason to fret unnecessarily.
What to do when your boyfriend gets mad at you?
The first rule in a relationship if the partner gets mad is never to lose your calm and try to understand the root cause of such behavior. Once you know why they're behaving in this way, the solution will automatically come to you.
#1 Be romantic
Try to be a romantic partner to your boyfriend; if you are always inspecting and never romantic, then you are more of a mother than a girlfriend. That way, the entire point of being in a relationship or dating someone fades away.
There are many ways to be romantic. You can be romantic via text. Send him jokes and puns. Don't let go of his hands when you are together. Overcall, express your love for him.
#2 Answer his questions
If he ever asks you questions or has asked in the past, I suggest you give him the answers. Answering his questions will help you to establish trust in your relationship.
If you have always dismissed his questions, he might be hurt, and that might be the reason for his behavior.
#3 Be insightful
Not all questions need to be answered. Learn to watch and understand. Study the patterns. You don't have to ask him questions all the time.
Try to know him through his routine, through the kind of people he keeps in life. Observe his behavior with other people. Pay close attention to the kind of language he uses. Is he courteous with one and all? Such simple speculation will give you leads to all your doubts.
#4 Spend more time together
Spending quality time together can bring a huge impact on your relationship. When you spend more time together, you automatically know the person.
Not only that, but you also start trusting the person. It will help both of you to open up to one another. On the other hand, spending less time together will always keep you curious.
You would want to know about his whereabouts. You would want to see proof of the people he is spending his time with or of the work he is handling. You will become suspicious for each moment that he has spent away from you and has not described to you in detail. That is never a healthy sign for any relationship.
#5 Get to know his friends
Getting to know his friends can be a great aid for you. Knowing them would not only help you to know more about his past but also help you in developing an understanding of his present. You would naturally be able to give him more space.
#6 Talk it out
Communication is a sign of a healthy relationship. Talking it out and resolving issues is better than letting things hang on. Problems won't find their solutions.
Naturally, they need to be figured out and fixed so that you don't face another such moment of doubt again. Find permanent solutions to temporary problems. Your objective should be clear, and you want to make this work.
#7 Work on your listening skills
Improve your listening skills. You won't need to ask questions if you listen to your boyfriend's words attentively. You will get your answers right there in those words, either directly or via reading between the lines.
Reading between the lines is not as complicated a process as it is taken to be. All you have to do is to take note of the things he puts stress on while he is talking to you. Those things go on in his mind when he is thinking about you or is with you.
Say he talks about food all the time, and it means that he would either want you to cook for him or widen up your eating habits.
Say you're a vegan, and he is not. It bothers him because he doesn't want to go on a date with a vegan. But he can't tell you this straight. He can't just tell you to be a non-vegetarian, right? But it is always on your mind. Because as lovers if you can't meal together, then that takes away much of the pleasure.
Now, if you keep asking him why he doesn't go on a date with you, he won't know what to say and thus might end up getting mad at you.
Hence, try to study the patterns; once it's done, you will figure out a solution together.
#8 Get over the question session and switch to a fun activity
Don't spend all your time making interrogations. For a change, suggest a fun activity that you can enjoy together. Go for a movie or go for a stand-up show. There's nothing better than laughing your wits off together. It will pull you two close, and you would love to recall it in times alone.
If your boyfriend gets mad at you when you ask him simple questions, all you have to do is give him a break from the question session. Instead, work on spending quality time together.
When you spend a good time, preferably doing some fun activity, there wouldn't be much room left for asking questions. Focus more on living the present and making the happiest moments.