My Girlfriend Doesn't Want to Meet Me [SOLVED]Your girlfriend doesn't want to meet you because she didn't find you compatible. If you have different fields of interest and mostly stay quiet when you spend time together, she might not enjoy your company. You might want to take some interest in her hobbies and show her that you care.
Relationships get stronger when we spend more time with each other. Little moments of happiness and sorrow bring us closer than ever. When we are dating someone, we have an instinct to spend quality time with each other.
You started dating a while back, and you used to find ways to meet each other as soon as you could take out some time. Spending time together hand in hand was something you always looked forward to.
However, if, at present, this isn't happening in your case, there has to be some room for a glitch. In this article, we shall try to figure out why your girlfriend is unwilling to meet you up and what you can do to fix it.
Possible reasons why your girlfriend doesn't want to meet you
The most likely reason your girlfriend is trying to avoid your company is that something has put her off. It can be your words or your action or your lack of actions.
Girls get mad at the slightest things. It isn't very easy to completely understand their mind and know their behavior. However, we are here to help you out and fix this! Keep reading to know more.
#1 She is busy
If your girlfriend stops meeting you out of the blue, it might be that a sudden change has occurred in her life that is keeping her so occupied that she is unable to devote her time to you. It can be one of those unavoidable circumstances which require her unflinching attention.
One of her family members is sick, or she is busy doing office work as it is the end of the financial year. Either way, dropping a polite text message to ask her if there's any way in which you could assist her would take you a long way. I've shared a template of such a text message below:
"Hey, baby! It seems that of late you have been keeping very busy. However, I want to remind you that I madly love you and if there is any way I can help you or would get to spend time with you, please let me know. You can tell me more over tete a tete sipping your favorite mocha at Starbucks.
Such a message will win her heart, and she will not be able to ignore it any longer. It will also give her room to open up with you, and she might catch up with you soon.
#2 She is keeping a secret from you
Your girlfriend might be avoiding your company because she keeps a secret from you. This secret could be something from her past that she is trying to fix or something about her future that she is busy planning. It might be or might not be related to you. The only way to know about it is to wait for her to tell you.
However, you can send her signals and gestures to show her your love which makes her trust her secret.
Something such as a reference to a past incident where she had trusted you with something and you have kept it secured with you might help her to think on this note and trust you back with whatever she might be up to.
#3 She is cheating on you
Your girlfriend might not want to meet you because she is guilty of cheating on you. She might not be able to eye contact you or make love to you in the same manner if she has cheated on you. Notice if there are changes in her behavior besides refusing to meet you.
If she is also avoiding talking or chatting with you, it is alarming. Showing up at her place to give her a surprise might give you some clues as to what is going on in her life.
#4 She is not in the city
Your girlfriend is not meeting you because she is not in the city to see you. Something took her away, or she decided to go on a vacation without informing you, as she knew you would never willingly let her go all by herself.
Such desperate measures are taken mostly under the influence of a friend who is single or interested in dating your girl.
#5 She is planning a surprise for you
Your girlfriend may be avoiding meeting you because she is planning to give you a surprise. If your birthday is around the corner or your yearly anniversary with your girlfriend is around the corner, she might be working hard to surprise you this time.
It is not much of a warning sign if she stays connected with you and there's no change in her behavior.
#6 She needs a break from you
Breaking communication and avoiding meetings are the signs that precede a break-up. If your girlfriend is not meeting with you, and there are other significant changes in her behavior, too, it might be that she has become wary of investing herself in this relationship.
Your girlfriend is looking for a break from you. If in this period it occurs to her that you are the one for her and she would want to spend more time with you, you are a lucky man. If not, you will have to find ways to show your love to her.
#7 She doesn't enjoy her time spent with you
Your girlfriend might not want to meet you because you bore her. If your girlfriend doesn't enjoy the time spent with you, that is, if you don't laugh together, crack jokes and make love, this might not be working out for either of you.
If your relationship is stressful and you mostly break into fights when you meet, she is avoiding you to avoid fights.
If the verbose occurs because you are an insecure boyfriend, you will have to mend your ways. Knowing your girlfriend's friends will take you a long way in building and maintaining trust.
#8 She is not serious about you
Your girlfriend doesn't like to take out time to meet you. She meets you when she is in the mood or has ample time on her hands.
This implies that she is not into putting effort into you. It is for you to judge by her conduct if she is serious about you or if it's a fling for her.
Girls don't often take the dating scene seriously. If your relationship is young and you never had the butterfly phase, it's more like you are pushing into it rather than desiring to be in it. You might want to talk to her about it and get a clear indication of your mutual expectations from the relationship.
#9 You did not ask her out properly
Your girlfriend hesitates in meeting you because you haven't asked her out properly yet. There is a communication gap between both of you.
You push it on to the other person to understand your feelings rather than trying to convey them. If you want to meet your girlfriend, tell her the same in clear and concise language.
She will be bound to give you an explanation if she is indeed not interested in meeting you. While if she agrees at once, it suggests that she was waiting for you to ask her out properly for so long.
#10 She wants to call it off
Your girlfriend is avoiding meeting you because she wants to call it off. For one reason or another, she feels that it's not working. It can be so because she is not ready for absolute commitment and devotion. It can also be because she is drawn towards someone else.
Asking her the reasons directly will come to your aid here. Drop a text requesting, "What is it that you feel is not working for us?" and you might get a prompt reply to it.
If she is on the same page as you, she will explain her reasons. If she didn't give it thought, there's no strong reason for not meeting you up, and she might show up at your door.
#11 Her face is covered with pimples
Your girlfriend is not meeting you because she is conscious of her appearance. It can be that sudden pimples or facial hair are coming in the way of her otherwise glorious beauty or that she has lately put on weight and is afraid that you might not like the sight of carbs on her tummy.
Video call is the way to go here. She will not be able to hide her looks and appearance. You can make her feel comfortable and at ease if either of the above is happening with her. You must make your girlfriend feel loved no matter the circumstances.
#12 She is mad at you
Your girlfriend might not want to meet you because she is mad at you. It might be because you told her a lie or forgot about some special day in her life.
Sending her apology cards or promising her to make up for it in ways that she feels pampered might be the way to mend the situation.
#13 Spending time with you recalls her memories
It might be that your girlfriend is not meeting you up because there is something about you or your words that triggers past incidents in her life.
It can be about her ex, or it can be about some serious incident. Talking here about it, familiarising yourself with her past, looking at her old photos, and finding ways to initiate and direct conversation in that direction might be the way to go.
#14 She feels you have taken her for granted
If you have been neglecting your girlfriend, not answering her calls, being late whenever you go out, being secretive about your phone, or any such things that make her suspicious about you or make her feel that you have taken her for granted, it might lead her in refusing to meet with you.
Any of the said forms of behavior is unacceptable. If anything, you must make your girlfriend feel loved and special. Show her what she means to you at every opportunity that you get.
#15 She is not attracted to you
It might be that your girlfriend is not attracted to you, and you don't pair along very well. She might be jealous of her friends who have a boyfriend with whom they look like they are meant for one another.
Don't be disheartened, and everything is possible in today's world with a bit of effort. Work on your physique, dress us stylishly, be well mannered, put on the color that your girlfriend is wearing to make her feel yours and special.
#16 You're needy
Your girlfriend is avoiding you because you come across as a needy person. If you are not sharing an emotional understanding with her or your emotions are negative and energy-draining, she might need a break now and then.
It would help if you made it more light-hearted rather than being serious all the time. The relationship wouldn't be all about making out. There should be some fun moments, and the most important aspect is that you enjoy each other's company that makes you long for one another all the time.
What to do when your girlfriend doesn't want to meet you?
If your girlfriend finds ways to avoid meeting you, work on earning back her trust. Show her that you love her and your love is unconditional. Once she is convinced that nobody can love her the way you do, she will stay with you.
However, to know how to win her love and get stronger together, continue reading below.
#1 Give her time
If you feel your girlfriend needs time, you might want to allow her some. It's better if she makes up her mind and clarifies her stance.
Sometimes, distancing away from the ones you want to stick by helps you understand each other's importance in your life.
#2 Show up at her place
If your girlfriend is unwilling to travel far or if you feel that she is not keeping well, showing up at her place might be a pleasant surprise. However, it is advisable not to go alone if she stays with her parents. Take a mutual friend and carry something like her favorite dessert or some flowers.
#3 Talk it out
To resolve any matter with any person, you got to convert your botheration. Talking out with your partner will do you good. If your girlfriend is not meeting you up, talk with her over call and let her know your concern. You are supposed to form an understanding and communicate your needs and expectations smoothly.
#4 Get to know her routine
If your girlfriend is not meeting you up, familiarising yourself with her routine will take you a long way in establishing a good understanding. Knowing where she goes and when she is free will help you sort out when to meet her.
If she is mostly busy with her office work on the weekdays and you pester her to take out time to meet you, she might not like it.
Whereas late evening on Saturdays, if you text her to see you downstairs, she will appreciate your understanding and make special efforts to make it a quality time when you both are together.
#5 Give her a surprise
Giving your girlfriend occasional surprises will keep your relationship romantic and bridge up for the time when you had to stay away from one another. Her appreciation will come in the form of reciprocation, which will help you acknowledge your bond and make it more meaningful in the process.
#6 Recreate moments with her
If you feel that your girlfriend is distancing herself from you, recreating moments with her, the moments from the past which were cherished by both of you might help to bring you closer.
Try to plan and execute it whenever you get an opportunity.
In fact, you can drop a text and tell her that you have planned something, and you would love to see her reaction to it. Or plan it all out and send her a photograph with the address and time attached. She would be there if the bond holds meaning to her the way it does to you.
#7 Send her flowers
If your girlfriend doesn't want to meet you, she is perhaps mad at you. It might be something that you forgot or something that you said that had hurt her feelings.
Sending her a bouquet of her favorite flowers along with the ones you love or with a beautiful message like, "Some flowers for my flower," would bring back the lost spark.
If your girlfriend is a poetry lover, musing verses on her beauty in the Spencerian style to court your love to her can be a beautiful way to win her heart again!
#8 Check her social media
If your girlfriend is refusing to meet you or making excuses to avoid meeting you, scrolling down on her social media feed might give you some strong clues as to what is going on in her mind or where she is spending most of her time.
It can also display with whom she is keeping busy, and if she continues to avoid you, you can get in touch with this person and ask for arranging a meeting between you and her.
#9 Ask her friends
If your girlfriend is not meeting you, seeking help or information from her friends could be a way to go.
However, you cannot ask them to help you if you haven't met them in the past or if you haven't made your relationship official.
Hence, it is always advisable to familiarise yourself with your partner's friends, at least with close ones.
#10 Learn her hobbies
Learning about the hobbies of your girlfriend and about the places she usually likes to visit when she is upset or feels low would give you an idea about where to find or locate her.
Learning about her haunts and hobbies will also help you skill up in the same way so that you have something passionate to share with her.
#11 Learn about her past
It is elemental to have a brief knowledge about what has gone in your girlfriend's past. This will help you to understand the reasons behind her behavior and insecurities.
It will render you able to handle her behavior without taking her words and actions to your heart. You will be able to perform objective criticism rather than making everything personal and making decisions by keeping yourself at the center of all of it.
#12 Give her a note of apology
It is always best to send your girlfriend a note of apology if you feel that she is hurt by something that you might have ignorantly done. A note of apology can take you a long way. One must never be egoistic when dating. You should feel comfortable sharing your feelings and insecurities with the person you are seeing.
You can try something like, "Darling, if there is anything that I've done or said, which you have taken by heart, please forgive me, my love, you mean the world to me!" This shall definitely paint a smile on her face.
#13 Show her that she is special
If your girlfriend is staying aloof, it might be because you have been indifferent to her or taken her for granted. Making her feel special can take you a long way.
Plan a staycation with her. A staycation will help you spend long uninterrupted hours together.
It will not only bring you close but also help you to discuss matters which you would hesitate to share over the phone. When you treat your girl like a queen, she will make you feel like her king.
#14 Get to know her preference
If your girlfriend avoids meeting you, try to get to know her male preference.
The kinds of guys she has dated in the past, which celebrities she likes, what makes her jaw drop, and what she finds attractive and appealing.
Knowledge of this range and scale will help you work yourself and make yourself closest to what she would love to have.
If her friends find you likable and attractive, if they consider you a true gentleman, your girlfriend would love to hang out with you.
If your girlfriend does not want to meet you, give her time till she changes her mind and, in the process, take your time to know and understand her better.
Sit with a pen and paper and note down the things which eventually lead to her abnormal behavior when she begins to avoid you. It will give you hints about her likes and dislikes, and in the future, you will need to refrain from doing things that go unappreciated.